City of Night

For Haiti

FOR HAITI

It didn't matter how many rainbows they painted on the fence--the orphanage playground was more like a prison yard than a children's park, and everyone knew it.

I'd known it the second they dumped me here, three years ago, and I wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed back then. You'd think your whole family dying would wise you up a bit more, but no. The other children had taken care of that.

I missed my family a lot, but I wouldn't have admitted it if you held a knife to my throat. Not to anyone here. The other children, looking for an outlet for their own pain, would rip me to shreds.

It was a dog eat dog world, and no-one knew it better than us. I'd do the same myself given half the chance, although I'd probably feel sorry afterwards. Maybe.

It would stop the pitiful looks from the adults, a constant reminder of things you wanted to forget. You wouldn't be the victim any more.

I was on the swing in the garden, first go, and I had the scraped knee and bruised side to show for it. I wasn't sure whether it was worth it, to be honest. No matter how high I swung, I could never see over the garden fence--just the stupid rainbows grinning at me.

'Marissa! Off the swing and let the other kids have a go!' yelled a carer, appearing at the door. She was trailing a little shadow with her.

'Okay,' I replied sweetly, narrowing my eyes at the boy beside her. His mouth was too large. I would have to remind him of that.

Deliberately slowly, I dragged my toes into the dirt to stop the swing, and the ground juddered under my feet.

'Marissa!'

'I'm coming!' I shouted back, getting off and taking a few steps towards the door. It took me that long before I realised the juddering hadn't stopped. The whole world was beginning to shake.

'What's happening?' I said, hesitating on my path towards her.

'Come here, now!' said the woman, She grabbed the little boy beside her, her other hand gripping the doorframe. Something coloured her voice that I hadn't heard on a carer before.

Fear.

A siren began to wail from the top of the fence. The suddenness of it made me jump, or maybe it was just the shaking knocking me about.

'Marissa, hurry up!' said the little boy, snapping me out of it. He was clutching onto the woman's skirt.

I began to sprint towards them, but the shaking pulled the ground from under my feet, sending me sprawling into the dirt. The carer screamed, and the sound tore right through my brain. I tried to claw myself back onto my feet, but it was impossible--like two people bouncing out of sync on a trampoline. The siren was still wailing and wailing. I couldn't think.

I couldn't help myself--started to cry. Was this my punishment?

Through the shaking, I registered big blocks falling towards me. I screamed myself, but all the air whooshed out of me as something heavy fell on me.

Pain. That was all I could feel. Pain, and sickness and fear. I felt myself being crushed against the ground. I had done bad things, but surely I didn't deserve this.

'I'm sorry,' I tried to say, but the stone block was crushing my chest. It was hard to even draw breath. I began to feel lightheaded, even through the pain.

Suddenly, all the bad stuff was erased, and I was engulfed in a bright light. My body felt strangely free.

I looked up, confused yet glad, and saw the last thing I had ever expected--the bright faces of my lost family looking down at me. I let out a sob. I was so happy. So happy. They were here. They smiled at me, and mother extended her hand.

'Come on, Marissa. It's time for us to go.'

I smiled back and took her hand, letting go of the last holds on my earth-bound body.

Finally, I was free.