PEEK

chapter 9: the laptop

Days have passed really fast, I spend a lot of precious time with the boarders, shopping with them, sole time with each of them. But still there are times that I feel like they have something in mind that they want to tell me. Ren, who became too attach to me is not an exemption. He always look at me like he wants to tell me something.

I can’t forget how jungmin and hyung jun just advised me to go back home and leave this place. I cant forget how me and kyu felt like almost doing something in bed, but then, I just can’t understand why I feel like I am into hyun joong and we ended up cuddling each other on bed.

I still keep seeing weird things, I keep imagining my brother’s face. How do I know how he looks like at the present, we were parted 20 years ago, but there is this image that I keep hallucinating most of the time that look really alike like me. I assume he is that, my dear brother. I still have nightmares of someone trying to suffocates me, I keep seeing myself making out with someone, I am not strong enough to convince myself that those were just dreams, maybe I am already treated in a mental hospital.

It’s midnight and I woke up panting and gasping for air while holding my neck. I had a nightmare again. Someone is trying to kill me. I got up from my bed and decided to go in the kitchen due to my throat is getting dry, with my weak knees. I weakly headed downstairs when I saw kris and tao watching television in the living room.

“hyung, you okay? Kris run to me and asked, they both held me to the sofa to sit as soon as they saw me.

“I just,,, I woke up like I was tired and all,,,,I answered huskily..

“you had nightmare again? Tao asked…

“yeahh,, I replied and look at him,,,how’d you know? I returned a question..

“you always have,, we often hear you talked in your sleep like you are scared or something…tao said..

“really?..I wonder again…

“wait,,I think you need water,,kris talked and run to the kitchen and came back with a glass of water..

I drank and sighed. The two just stared at me. I stared back to them.

“hyung!! Why are you here? I mean why’d you came back here? Kris asked..

“me? I just want to pay visit to my father and my brother.,,I answered with a weak smile..

“gil young hyung really misses you, we often see him looking at a picture,tao spat out with that sad face in him.

“I miss him too, but I can’t do something back then until the news was sent to us, that he’s dead.,, and I was too young when my father died and I never had to visit him. I was worried how my brother lives without my father, until my auntie called us and she’s willing to take good care of him. I felt relieved a little since he still have guardian but what I can’t accept, is that he died without waiting for me to come, he didn’t able to see me again..saengie cried..

“he do, he did, but he can’t wait much longer, he suffered with,,,tao stopped and look at kris..

“he suffered being alone,, he got depressed, and according to the doctor, he was really stressed. He stopped talking to us all. He always lock himself in the room. Kris continued…

“I feel pity on him but we didn’t had the choice. Our parents’ got divorce and we are too young and don’t understand everything and all we had to do is to follow what they planned for us.. I sighed, remembering how life became cruel to us, to the point that we had to live separately. I stated..

“Young saeng, why are you still up? My auntie came and went to us.. You look pale what’s wrong? She noticed and pat my forehead…

“ahhh nothing,, I said…auntie, can we talk? I askd after,,