Love Like A Delinquent

Chapter 27 <3

I couldn't though.

Because after, I'd feel disgusting. Yes, for a few minutes I'd feel amazing and I'd love Kat more than ever. But then I'd feel like I'd hurt her. Because it was no different from what happened to me. And if it hurt me, it would kill her.

Call me stupid, but I was confused.

And that was how I felt about being with anyone that way.

But, I still felt like a douche for chickening out with Kat. And the nightmare I'd had earlier was still in my head, scaring the shit out of me. The nightmare was making me think of my Dad, Dad was making me think of all the things he'd done to me, and that was making me think of how I was so stupid for not defending myself.

I took another drag of the roll of tobacco.

I was so fucking worthless.

Pathetic.

Stupid.

I was nothing.

"Hunter? Are you in there?"

Chris banged on the bathroom door, making me jump a little bit. I yanked my sleeve down, stuffed the broken piece of the razor in my pocket, and then jumped up. Urgently, I grabbed the deoderant and sprayed myself with it to get rid of the smokey scent. Then I dumped the rollie in the bin.

I slowly opened the door and popped my head out.

"Yeah?"

Chris reached forwards to touch my shoulder. "You ok? You look a little pale."

"I'm fine."

He nodded but didn't seem to believe it. "I need to talk to you. Can I come in? I don't wanna talk anywhere else in case Kat hears."

"Um...sure."

I stepped backwards so that Chris could come into the bathroom. I sat down against the bath and hoped desperatley that he wouldn't smell the leftover smokey scent.

Chris closed the door and leant back against it, crossing his arms and looking straight at me.

"We've got a problem..."

Shit.

Chris cleared his throat. "When Lisa came to the house the day you came back from the hospital, she took something."

"What did she take?" I asked quietly.

"Your journal."

Fuck. Oh fuck. Oh, fuck fuck fuck fuck.

"What the fuck?!" I demanded, slamming my fist against the bath. I angrily stood up and kicked the wall until I probably gave it a concussion. I didn't mind Kat reading the entries because I'd probably end up telling her anyways. But Lisa? The bitch? It just pissed me off so fucking much.

"Hunter, stop!"

I ignored Chris and punched the wall so freaking hard that an ache spread right up my hand and a small crack appeared on the tiles.

"FUCK!" I screamed, slamming my fist against it ever more.

Suddenly, Chris grabbed my arm and spun me around, facing him.

"Hunter, calm down-"

"Calm down? She fucking stole it! What did she do with it?!"

"She showed it to the judge that's deciding who gets custody of Kat."

"Why?!"

"To prove that I was an unfit Father."

"How the fuck does that make you seem like an unfit Father?!"