The Memory Playlist

Forever

"Take a break," he says finally. He turns my face towards him. "We've been so caught up in each other and trying to have a baby that it's like we aren't in love anymore when we are. We're just selfish machines." (A/N: I realized this is a PTV album a day later, haha. Oops.)

"What am I supposed to do?" I ask.

"Go out to eat with Tim and his girl," he suggests. "Go hang out with Riot or your band. Just get out of the house. It'll do you some good."

I sigh and ruffle my hair. "What'll you do all day?" I ask.

He shrugs and laughs. "Who cares? Just go have fun, okay?"

I sigh. "I guess I could go shopping for a while. I need more pants before we go visit your parents in a few weeks."

"Perfect," he says. "Invite Riot to go shopping, okay? Don't even think about me or our goal." He cups my cheek and rubs his thumb over it. "Just take a break."

I sigh and nod, though that seems impossible. "Okay, Prophet."

He smiles and kisses my cheek. As I stand up, he does too and walks into the bathroom. I sigh and run a hand through my hair, pushing my bangs back. I grab my phone, which is sitting next to Andy's, and dial Riot's number. After a few minutes, we're set to meet up at eleven at one of the nearby outdoor malls to walk around.

When Andy gets out of the bathroom, I take a shower, the hot water feeling nice against my skin and through my hair. I get dressed in a pair of shorts with cut outs of hearts in them-- which Andy and I did together-- and an Attila tank top. I wear my black, worn out Converse, too. I might get new shoes. Once I'm dressed, I tie up my hair, letting bits and pieces fall out to make a messy-- but not ratchet messy, like classy messy-- updo. Lazily, I put a thin rim of eyeliner around my eyes and fill in the space in my eyelids with black eyeshadow. When I'm done, it's ten forty-five. I bid Andy a hesitant goodbye, being so unused to leaving him by now, and get in my Jeep. The drive is short.

Riot and I meet up quickly, hugging and catching up for a few minutes at Starbucks. I talk, very minimally for Andy's sake, about our situation and explain to her the reason for this trip, and after that she drops our previous conversation. We start walking around afterwards. We stop at Hot Topic and I buy three pairs of skinny jeans-- one that's acid washed white and gray, one that's completely leather, 'cause my old ones wore out, and one where one leg is completely black and the other is red plaid and very punk rock-- and two band shirts. After that, we walk around and to Victoria's Secret, where I buy, obviously, underwear. We then walk to a shoe store and I buy all black Converse and a new pair of Doc Martens. We stop at a candy store and pick up little sweet things, mine including chocolate covered coffee beans and Junior Mints for Andy. We wind up walking into a Target too-- somehow-- and I buy little things that Andy and I have run out of that are important. By the time we're done shopping, it's almost two o'clock. We decide to go to lunch, and I call Tim and Emily to see if they want to join at the last minute. Tim says they're busy, but I can tell they aren't and that they're just reveling in each other. Must be nice not having to worry all that much.

We eat lunch/dinner (lunner?) and wind up going back to her house. She shows me a few things she'd been working on with her guitar, and I clean some of it up with her and kind of start putting together another song with her. It's really fun, and it invests my whole being in the process so I'm not distracted with anything. When that's done, it's six thirty.

I say goodnight to Riot and thank her for getting my mind off of everything and showing me a good time. As I drive home, I listen to the album we put out at the beginning of the year and replay that experience, enjoying the brief moments I have with it.