Aviation| A Milex Fanfiction

23. When the Sun Goes Down

A\N: this one was tough to write.  I hope you all like it. Let me know what you think your  feedback makes me do happy dances and be less sad.

Alex finds himself lost in thought the entire plane ride to New York, staring blankly out the window, oblivious to everything and everyone around him. He has so many questions but he doesn't know how to voice them. He feels sick and empty knowing that a piece of himself he was never aware he had had been ripped away from him. Miles didn't seem to mind the fact that Alex was quiet, off in his own head. He took the opportunity to read a book on his iPad waiting for the flight to be over, Alex would let him know if he needed him. He was there for support after all.

The night before had been rough on them both. Alex hadn't been able to sleep at all, evident but the way he swayed slightly in his seat, somehow managing to never close his eyes. He'd spent most of the night sobbing while Miles held him, unable to sleep himself. He couldn't bare the idea of leaving Alex alone, not when he was like that.

" I feel like everything is closing in on me Mi, it's just too much. The wedding, all the bullshit with Cat, finding out that you almost died because of me, my nervous fucking breakdown, now this. I feel like I'm falling apart." He'd confessed.

"Don't worry Al, it's going to be ok. If you fall apart I'll be here to help you pick up the pieces, always. Don't forget that." Miles had replied, carding his fingers through Alex's hair.

" I love you so much, Miles."

" I love you too." He'd reminded him. 

Miles always knew how best to calm him down, always had. That's why Alex had asked him to come along. He needed him, badly. There's nothing he'd have liked more at the moment then to be able to cuddle up against Miles and have a nap. He was longing for the other boy to be playing with his hair, whispering to him that it was going to be ok and that he loved him like he'd done the night before. Unfortunately, they were in public so that wasn't really possible. He eventually decided if he could make it casually look like he'd nodded off and ended himself up on Miles' shoulder then that might be alright, he could probably get away with that without rousing any suspicions. Instead, he just sighed, "Think I need a drink." He muttered, causing Miles to look over at him.

" Think you need some sleep, you look like hell mate." Miles countered.

" Think I need the drink so I can shut me brain off and go to sleep," Alex said, with all his thoughts racing the way they were it was impossible for him to nod off without being awakened again in seconds, no matter how many times he tried.

" You know, a quick shag in the bathroom might do it for you. Get you wore out." Miles said earning him a sideways glance from Alex. Usually, he'd be up for that sort of foolery but the look on his face seemed to ask ' are you fucking kidding me right now'

"I'm not in the mood Mi." He sighed.

"I know, I know I was just playing with you puppet."

"I'm sorry I'm such a downer today." Alex sighed deciding that fuck it most of the people around them were old and probably wouldn't know who they were anyway so he leaned his head against Miles' shoulder.

"Alex, don't apologize. What you found out last night that's... that's pretty Jarring news yeah? It was more a statement than a question.

" Yeah..." Alex answers back anyways.

"Then you've got every right to be upset." Miles assured him. They'd both been through a lot lately. Miles is exhausted from it all as is but Alex seems absolutely drained. He can't fathom how he's feeling right now having this new development stacked on top of all the other madness