4/11 Our Sweet Love || j.hs ✔️

Chapter 5

"Hey.. So since you're going on a date, I'm assuming tomorrow.." He says and I blush because he's right. "Why don't you drop Oliver over at my house so that he doesn't have to be alone at home, he can play with Sunny. And you can pick him up right after or something." I bite my lip. "Wow. You'd do that for me? Take care of Oliver?" I ask. A huge smile breaks out on his face. "Of course. And plus. He's still a puppy." He says, he then brushes his hair out of his face.

"And plus.. You're my new friend.. And friends do favors for their friends." He says. Every time he said friend it made me want to tell him that he should have asked me out first before stupid Shawn did. Then maybe there wouldn't be this problem with my thoughts and emotions. Then he gives me a look that he got an idea.

"Hey. How about. If tomorrow your date goes horribly bad, I'll take you out for ice cream? I know a really great spot for shaved ice cream." He smiles, and for some reason my heart pounds happily. I can't help but smile at his adorable gesture. "Deal. But how will you know?" I ask. He purses his bottom lip and taps his chin with his finger.

"If you pick up Oliver tomorrow night, it didn't go well, you hate he guys guts and we got our deal. And if you pick him up the next morning..." He pauses as if not wanting to say it.. And I kind of didn't want him to say it either. "You liked him a lot and you plan on going out with him again." He finishes and nods. "Deal?" He asks. I smile. "For sure the last one won't be it." I say.

He chuckles. "Can't be so sure, what if he surprises you?" He asks. I stare into his eyes. "What if he doesn't..?" He bites his lip and grins. "Then.. I guess. We've got a date." He says. I smile.

**

"Crazy to think that this is where we met just yesterday." He says, with a smile as he walks through the water. I look down at my feet in the wet sand. "Yeah... Yesterday.. A crazy day.." I say. "So. Tell me more about you. Since we're friends now.. Right?" He asks. I look at up at him and smile. "Of course we're friends.. What do you want to know?" I ask. He smiles. "First kiss." He says. I bite my lip trying to think about the first time I kissed a boy.

"His name was Kim Jae and he kissed me on the lips under the slide at the playground in school. That was when I was 9." I chuckle. "You?" I ask. He taps his chin. "I was 16 and it was behind the bleachers with a girl named Bora." He tells me. "Wow. That must have been very special for you." I tell him. He blushes. "Eh.. I guess.." He says. "Next question." I say. He smiles. "The funniest memory that you have." He says. I chuckle at the instant thought of it.

"I remember when I was little and I got into my moms makeup and bra drawer .." I chuckle and I feel my eyes water. "And she walks in on me, with makeup all over my face looking like the biggest disaster.. With her bras all over my body.." I don't realize I'm crying.. "And... And my mom yells.. 'Faith! What have you done!? Wearing my bras and ruining your beautiful face!'" I bite my lip as it quivers.

"And I remember saying.. 'Bra? What's a bra? I thought these were to hold my oranges.' And after that she just laughed at me.." I tell him. I hadn't noticed that we had stopped in our tracks and he was watching me as I cried. "Faith.. Are you okay?" He asks. I wipe my tears, "I'm just fine." I say looking away from him. His thumb on my chin making me look at him. He's much closer to me, closer than he was before. "She left..." Is all I can say. He frowns.

"I'm so sorry.." He whispers. His dark chocolate eyes looking into mine.

I found myself lost in the sweet abyss of his orbs that seemed to pull me towards him, that made it easy for me to cave in. He pulls me into a hug and I completely break down. He rubs my back and runs his fingers along my pony tail. "Just let it out Faith. Its okay." He says. I bury my face in his chest, as I tremble to the thought of my mother abandoning me with my father.

My father, who doesn't know what love is. And thanks to him, I don't know what love is either, being that all he does is force me to do what he wants and doesn't let me live my dream. I begin to wonder if things would be different if my mother had stayed.

My tears go away and my breathing goes back to normal. I look up at him, his hand staying on the small of my back. Not that I'm complaining, but he's inches away from me. And I wonder if he can feel my heart pounding against my chest, and if he could feel it.. that it pounded for him. "Thank you.. Hoseok.." I whisper as I'm completely hypnotized by his thick lips.

"Yo- you're welcome... Faith.." He says inching closer. *bark!!* I find myself ripped out of Hoseoks arms and onto my back in the sand. "Sunny!" Hoseok yells.

**

I find myself thinking about today as I lay on the couch in my living room. I look down at Oliver as he jumps around and plays with his new toys. I smile to myself.

Thoughts run through my head making me feel things that I'm not willing to let myself feel, I can't. Decisions and debates trail my brain fighting off which one is more dominant. I slap my forehead. "What am I going to do!?" I yell. I stare down at Oliver, for a long time. Wondering and thinking of scenarios that would have or could have happened today.

"Like kissing Hoseok?" I frown. "No! Not that!" I scream. I hear a clicking sound in my head. "My dear Faith. Why don't you just let it be. You like Hoseok. And you can't deny it because I see it." I shake my head in complete denial. "No. I promise you that its nothing like that. I promise he's just a friend. A really... Really cute good looking friend. " I peep.

I hear a laugh in my head. "What about. If tomorrow goes bad.. Than just try things out further with Hoseok. And maybe things will fall into place." My brain says to me. I naw on my lip. "I'll have to think about that.. But.. Who knows, maybe Shawn will surprise and the date will go well." A rude chuckle goes out in my head. "A-ha!! Shawn? Really? I thought you didn't like him." I roll my eyes.

"I never said that. Okay? I just think he's a little pushy sometimes... Well.. The times I've met him.. And I don't know... Maybe its just because he knows what he wants. That's how he's a successful businessman." I say. Its quiet until my thoughts finally reply. "You don't know that.. You don't know what success is. And! You don't know what love is because you're a coward.." I frown at the sudden change in topic my mind has changed to.

"Um.. Excuse me? You're a part of me. So technically you don't know what success is either. And you also don't know what love is. I'm only a coward because you've taught me what being a coward is like." My thoughts laugh again.

"Faith. If love smacked you across the face you wouldn't realize it until I bit you in the ass on its way out of your life... And I'm that part of your brain that makes you realize that your wrong. And I'm telling you right now.. You need to get your life together and grow some lady balls so that you can paint.."

My eyebrows knit, and I realize that my life is a huge mess.. And that I need to listen to my head more often.