Sam Winchester x Reader: Together (A Supernatural Fanfic)

Chapter 19: Sorry

It's the next day, and things seem to have cooled down a bit between everyone. Dean has even apologized to me in full sincerity. In his words,
"Being a dick to people because they are who they are is wrong."

Wow.

Sam and I have also been much closer than we were beforehand, even earning some disgusted sighs from Dean and my father, who now apparently wants to be called Chuck. But, he says I can still call him Dad. Now, the four of us sit comfortably in the kitchen with a small TV next to us, tuned in to the news channel.
"--And just earlier today, astronomers made an unbelievable leap in the advancement of their technology, creating what many people are calling, 'The Super-Scope.' This Super-Scope is a very high tech telescope recently completed by scientists whom previously were almost completely shunned in their industry. With the ability to see almost .5 times farther than the Hubble telescope, we can now view galaxies and star systems even farther from our reach. Currently, only one system has been named, and that system will be called the 'Y/N Branch' from this day forward due to its tree-like shape. Composed of various multicoloured gas giants, this may be the brightest star grouping known to man. More tonight, on Channel 6 news. Have a good afternoon everybody."
Dad clicks off the television, and smiles at me.
"That good enough for you, sweetheart?"
I only smile widely, but he seems to understand. Sam coughs.
"Now that everyone here is on good terms, I think we should really... Discuss the biggest problem here. I'm pretty sure we all know what that is."
Everybody looks elsewhere in the room, as if trying to convince themselves that we could just leave this be and nothing would happen. That everything would be okay in the end. But its clear that it'll only get worse from here on.
"What have you two been thinking of to deal with her? Anything easy?"
I say, directing it towards to brothers. They just sigh and frown.
"Back whenever, we thought it would be possible to shove Amara away with the help of Lucifer, cause you guys have done it before. We got him a hand of God, and even then with all his power, he barely put a dent in her. So that's not gonna work."
Dean says, fixing the way his shirt sits on his body. I swear, I've only seen him and Sam wear flannels.
"Well, that's just it. We could get more hands of God, maybe then we could power up Y/N and see if she could do anything."
Sam says, tilting his head in my direction. Father speaks.
"A little redundant, don't you think?"
He says, waving his fingers around. This makes me giggle, and he smirks.
"Even if Y/N is really powerful, her and Lucifer are about as similar as it gets with power, even if she is a tiny bit more advanced than he is."
Chuck remarks, setting his head down on his left fist. Dean leans back.
"What do you mean 'more advanced?'"
He questions, taking a sip of Sam's coffee. It must be too hot for him, as he opens his mouth to fan his tongue not too long after. My Dad begins to pace.
"I know more than I knew when I taught Lucifer how to do things, I guess a better wording for what I meant to say is she's more 'efficient' than he is. She can perform actions quicker and hold illusions longer. Stuff like that."
"Illusions?"
Sam asks.
"Like Gabriel could do. He managed to convince you guys that he was trickster with what he made."
The three men nod, considering my potential. Due to pure curiosity, I twirl my fingers in an oval. White light temporarily streams from my fingertips, and when I blink, the light shapes itself into a small, classical ballerina that dances across the table top. She has auburn hair, and vibrant blue eyes. To accompany her, I conjure a male ballerina. His skin is a dark, coffee colour, like Sam's drink. His facial structure is chiseled. The two illusions dance together in harmony, whilst we all watch, the brothers in awe. When they seem to be too much of a distraction, I flick my hand up, and they disappear in a wave of pale pink.
"Huh."
I say, inspecting the metal where the tiny dancers once were. I shrug, and Father continues to lecture us about our possible options.
"Of course, things are going to be a lot different now putting my sister away. I don't have all of my archangels, we have all these people to protect... We'll have to be really careful."
He says, slowing his pace. I look between the others.
"What do you mean 'you don't have the other archangels?' We don't have Luci, but we've got Gabe, Mike, Ray..."
I trail off, counting the names on my fingers.
"Of course, we'll have to find them but..."
I stop talking.
Dad stands next to the boys, in place. They all share a similar guilty expression, that seems much too commonly used in this bunker.
"What... Why are you guys--"
"Y/N. Your brothers."
Father says. He gives me that sad frown again, the one he wore last night when he held me. I think I know where this is headed.
"What- Why do you look so unhappy? Dad?"
He, along with Sam and Dean look down and around, shadows over their eyes. What he's trying to say registers in my head.
"Dad... Daddy no... Please no, you've gotta be lying, this can't be real..! PLEASE TELL ME THIS IS SOME SICK JOKE!"
I yell, salty tears running down my face. He too has one visible tear drip from his eye.
"IT'S JUST A JOKE, THIS IS JUST A JOKE, PLEASE TELL ME YOU AREN'T SERIOUS! YOU'RE LYING TO ME!"
My voice breaks, and I do too. The cool floor greets me heartily when I drop to my knees in sorrow.
"It cant-- You can't-- Not all of them..."
Words now just tumble out of my mouth, as I try to form coherent sentences. But I just fail. Sobs shake me, accompanied by those words that have no place.
"Brothers--"
"Miss--"
"Not all--"
"Gabriel, Michael, Raphael."
Dean mumbles something.
"We aren't sure if Michael is dead, but he isn't gonna be here any time soon. So he may as well be."
An almost sympathetic tone coats his statement, but I still sob and whimper.
My face is completely wet, along with the top of my shirt. My father sits next to me, and I manage to croak out a clear string of words.
"Can't you... Can't you fix this? Can't you fix them?"
He shakes his head.
"But, you're GOD! You can do anything, you are light and life and the meaning of EVERYTHING! You have to be able to do something..."
Dad puts his hand on my back, making small, calming rings.
"Sweetie, it would take years, so many years that we don't have right now. There's no way that I could make them fast enough for our purpose."
"W-what if I help?"
"What?"
"I know how I was made now, you showed me! What if I- I just altered it enough to make me, them?"
He paused his movements to think, but the hand just starts moving again after just a couple moments.
"It wouldn't cut off enough time. Even if I did have your help, it just wouldn't be enough. I'm sorry."
I hang my head.
"Everyone's so fucking sorry but they can't do a thing..."
I whisper, more tears falling. He only sighs. A new wave of coolness brushes over my face, and undoubtedly it was Chuck, fixing the blotchiness. He picks me up, sitting me back in the chair. Hair still obscures my face, so nobody sees the final teardrop that streams down from my right eye.
"I'm sorry to ask, it feels like the wrong time to ask but..."
Sam starts, staring at me then my father. Dad waves his hand as if to say, 'continue.'
"...How exactly did Y/N help fight Amara if she didn't learn how to do all her angel stuff until last night?"
I wipe my tear, smiling emptily at Chuck. He grins a small grin too.
"I talked."
I say, answering for him. The brothers look on in confusion.
"You saw me talk to the demon. That tactic was from the scar of the experience I told you of, but it was because of something else too. It was all I knew how to do for a long time. I only knew how to be me and express myself, how to impact others on a deep level. That was the first thing I learned up there."
I casually throw my thumb in the air, pointing to the ceiling. They understand what I mean.
"What I did against Amara, I brought out that teensy tiny bit of love in her soul. That made her emotionally weak; while my brothers and Dad made her physically weak. That's how we turned her in. But I guess that's not gonna work this time around."
I conclude, my voice finally returning fully from my breakdown. Dad shakes his head.
"No, no it's not. But uh... We will need Lucifer. You and him could do a lot of damage against Amara together."
My father says, stroking his beard. Dean jumps into the conversation.
"Yeah, but we don't know where she took him. How the hell are we gonna find them?"
He questions, standing to join my Dad in pacing. However, father now walks out of the room, and we follow. We now find ourselves seated around a table with a faded map atop it. Dean pulls a laptop seemingly out of nowhere, starting to search for who knows what. Dad coughs to get our attention.
"Look, I'm not sure what's going to happen. But--"
"Guys. The fog hit another town."
Immediately our attention is once more turned over to Dean.
"What..?"
I ask, shifting to worriedly give him the floor.
"Yeah. Thousands have died. Everybody except for one guy. Why didn't you help them?"
He says to Chuck accusingly.
"She's baiting me. I can't give in to what she does."
"Dean, he's right. It wouldn't have been a smart move."
I add, walking around the table slowly, keeping my feet awake.
"But she... Chuck, where have you been? I know this isn't the most convenient time for a speech, but what have you been doing for all these years you were gone? Writing books and going to fan conventions? Because I'm not sure if you know this, but there's been plagues, and battles, wars fought in your name. People have prayed, but you just ignored them, and now look at what's happening. Just... Why?"
He almost shouts.
"Dean, I know you had a rough upbringing. But I'm not your father."
Sam sits back in his chair, suppressing a gasp.
"And I want you to know, that I was here a lot when you guys started out. Humanity, that is. I kept stepping in, nudging my little baby in the right direction, hoping it would grow up. But it never did. What I was doing was oppressing you. And now that I'm not as involved you're moving. Slowly, but surely. I'm sorry, but it was for the best."
Dean drops his head, muttering an 'Okay.' Under his breath. I tiptoe quietly over to the man, brushing my hand across his back in a calming manner. He lets out a sigh of anguish, but still, pulls his head up to face me. A tear runs down his left cheek, but he swipes it away before his brother can see it. I crouch down to look at the laptop screen, reading the short paragraph that idly awaits me on the page. I scan through it in seconds before straightening my posture.
"I think we need to pay this man a visit."