The Secret Five #Wattys2016

Day 251-Locklyn

Its been three days since I gave birth and I feel like a truck ran over me. I am happy that my babies are alive and healthy, but I don't think I ever want to go through that pain again. Cason has been wonderful with helping me and taking turns changing and feeding them. He loves them so much and whenever Everleigh cries and Cason picks her up, she stops instantly, maybe because he was the first person to hold her at birth.

I was up all night feeding the triplets. Joel is being fed by bottle while the girls are being breastfed. Joel is so much tinier than the girls and I'm worried he may have been premature.

I had the television on the movie channel and was feeding Paislee. Anya and Hadley walked into the living room seeing me sitting in the recliner. I didn't have a blanket over my chest.

"Sorry, she was being fussy and didn't have time to get the blanket. The boys are sleeping and I thought I was safe to feed her."

"You're fine, Locklyn," Anya said and went over to the crib. She stared in to look at Joel and Everleigh. "They are perfect. You really made beautiful children. I have never seen children this beautiful before." I laughed and looked down at Paislee. Her eyes were open and staring up at me.

"How do you feel Locklyn?" Hadley asked sitting down. "Still sore?"

"I feel like a truck ran over me 100 times. It is so worth the pain though because I have these three beautiful children to love and watch grow up." They both smiled. Paislee stopped eating and I put her on my chest and gently pat her back. I pulled up my shirt also. "Anya, can you get me Joel, he needs to be fed now."

"I can get you a bottle." Anya gave me Joel and took Paislee off my chest.

Hadley sat on the couch and watched the television closely. She wouldn't look at me and I sort of feel bad that I gave birth now. "Hadley," she glanced over at me and grinned slightly, just enough for me to see. "Are you mad at me?"

"No, why do you think that?" she was now looking at me.

"Because I had children and you lost your child. I feel bad about giving birth now and just want to make sure you are okay."

"I'm happy for you Locklyn. You gave me two nieces and a nephew. Why would I be mad over that? I'm upset that I lost my child but I was too young to be a mother. I wasn't ready. You thought you could never have children and you did and that should be the best feeling in the world."

"Okay, I just want to make sure."

"I'm happy for Cason and you. I watched and helped you give birth, I held Paislee right when she came out of your stomach, and I admired how beautiful she is. I look at these babies as a new start and I will always be there if you need help."

"Thank you, Hadley." she smiled widely. Anya gave me the bottle and I was about to start feeding Joel when I asked Hadley, "Had, do you want to feed Joel? I'm so tired."

"Yeah, sure," she was nervous. She came over, took Joel out of my arms, and started to feed him next to me. "How am I doing?"

"You're a natural." She smiled widely and stared down at Joel. He started to whimper and she repositioned him and he stopped. When Hadley was done with Joel, she bounced him lightly and he threw up a bit on her. I got up slowly, took a tissue, and gave it to her. she cleaned it up and continued to bounce him. "You got him while I go to the bathroom."

"Yeah, I'm fine with him. you go." I grinned and left the living room. I walked up the stairs slowly and into the girls' bathroom.

I pulled my shirt up to my chest and stared at myself in the full-length mirror behind the door. I had a stomach but that was to be expected since I had triplets. My stomach was soft and there were many faint stretch marks near my hips and towards the front and bottom of my stomach. I don't mind them because it shows what my body did and went through to create three lives and bring them into this great big world of ours.