Fourth

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The next day doesn't feel as happy as Ally wish it would. It starts off with a call from a man from the post office who says if she doesn't pick up the things in her PO box very soon, he'd start throwing things away. Ally sights. Things like that aren't top priority on her list of things to do. She wasn't able to live a normal live. The past few months felt like she was watching herself running errands and try to seem normal from up above. She didn't feel things she did or said. It was kind of a self protection mode. Since she decided yesterday that she wants to be herself again she has to give up that self protection and has to face all the happenings and the mess of her feelings and thoughts about them. And she has no idea if she is ready.
Ally leaves the house at 1pm, picks up a bottle of champaign at the liquor store a few blocks away and feels a little weird because she has no idea for whom or what she is bringing the bottle. Anyways, she decides to take the longer but less busy road to her families house which lays a few miles outside the city. She smiles as the tune of her favorite song fills the car and starts to sing along. She finally starts to feel a little better and is excited to meet her family in a bit. What she doesn't know is that this afternoon will turn into a nightmare for her or at least it seems to.
Everybody is waiting on Ally and they all sit in the big garden of the cute little white farmers house. All heads turn as Ally arrives, the conversations stopped and everybody is staring at Ally. 'Eehh, hi guys?' Ally said, not sure what to do. ' I brought champaign', she says and holds her empty hand up, and she realizes that she forgot the champaign in her car. She turns around and hurries to get back to her car. So, that was weird, she thought to herself. 'Ally!', she heard her mother yelling after her, 'get back here!' They clearly think that Ally wants to go back home. Ally's mouth forms itself to a grin and she runs a little bit faster. Yeah, they should all think, she's going back home. What do they think they are to just stare at Ally like she's a fucking alien? Ally thought they would love to see her. As she gets back with the champaign she has to calm her mother down who runs around always in tears. Now she gets hugs on hugs on hugs and everybody seems to love to see her. After everybody seemed to hug her at least twice, she looks around the garden to get an idea of who came because she still doesn't know why everybody is here. At least no one seems to know or they all act like they don't know. Ally asks several people and they all answer with 'I have no idea'. Ally glanced over to the shadows under the big apple tree where she used to train her climbing skills as a kid and her heart stops for a second. There SHE is. What the fuck? Why is SHE here? Why? Who the fuck invited her? Now she understands why everybody stared at her like idiots when she arrived and why her mother was so concerned as she walked away. Fuck. Emotions hit Ally hard, like a tsunami. There's confusion, there's anger and there is hate. But in the first place, there's a big black sadness that pulls Ally back in that giant hole she lived in the past few months. The emotions she forbid herself to feel overcome her with a strength and intensity of a thunderstorm. The last thing Ally sees before she passes out is HER eyes who slowly find Ally's and the expression on HER face as she realizes the emotions in Ally's eyes. She will never forget that expression she noticed in between darkness and light.

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