Bladed

Blade 4: Sunset on mother's window

When your'e running into something, drive like a maniac. It'll satisfy your system.

Bigla tuloy pumasok sa isip ko ang sinabing iyon ni Trace dahil sa bilis ng pagtakbo ko sa aking kotse ngayon. Parang singbilis ito ng bullet train habang nagmimistulang rumorolyong film ang nasa paligid ko. Everything I saw in my peripheral vision was blurred.

Malayo pa lamang ako ay tanaw ko na ang malaking gate na kulay itim at may malimlim na ilaw na nagmumula sa poste ng gate. I immediately stepped off the car as I parked my car on the vacant place near the gate just outside their compound.

Nakatayo ako ngayon sa harap ng isang malaking bahay, Asia Fretzer's home. Modern built with a touch of Mediterranean architecture. Kapansinpansin ang dami ng tao nang magsimula akong humakbang paloob.

"Amarillo Crouse," napalingod ako sa aking likod nang makita ko ang isang ginang na may malaking hawig kay Asia. It must be her mother. She has floppy eyes and almost red nose. She must be crying the entire day.

"I'm a friend, Mrs. Fetzer. I'm sorry," those are the only words my mouth could utter. I removed my stare from her eyes when I saw pain in it.

"Yeah," she exclaimed as she released a deep – very deep breathe. "I'll show you the way." Patungkol niya sa kinalalagyan ni Asia. Kabaligtaran ni Asia ang kanyang nanay. Masyado itong mahinhin at malumanay kung magsalita.

Kita ko ang mga taong nakaitim sa paligid. May ilan akong namumukhaan. Maaaring mga kaibigan niya na hindi ko kilala at ilang mga kaklase namin. Nagsimula kaming maglakad. May roong mga taong umiiyak sa harap ng kabaong nang mapalapit kami sa kinalalagyan nito. Nang umalis sila ay siyang paglapit namin. Humunga ako ng malalim ng masilay naming ang mukha ni Asia. Tinitigan ko ang kanyang itsura. Nagmistula lamang siyang natutulog. Biglang nagsikip ang aking dibdib. Parang gusto ko siyang pagalitan ngunit walang boses ang lumabas sa akin. Mistula akong nagging pipi.

"It was so sudden," I heard Mrs. Fretzer said. "We are not prepared. There were no any signs that I'm losing my Asia – our Asia this early. My A is not that good girl type but, she's no bad. She doesn't deserve anything of this. She may not care others lives but she never gave them something to be bothered of, never hurt anybody to receive horrible things as this."

Death is something that we can never be prepared of, even if we set all things for it. My mind screamed.

Hindi ko alam ang isasagot ko sa kanya nang lingunin ko siya. Ang luhang lumalabas sa mata ng isang magulang para sa kanyang anak ay isang bagay sa sobrang hirap matunghayan (is something that was really hard to witness). I'm not a mother but, I felt all her sadness screaming in her eyes because, I had grief first hand when my older sibling left me hanging. Lalo pa at ito na lang ang tanging meron ako noon. Masyadong masakit.

"If only I could beg Hades or anybody that is related to the god of death to lend my daughter a little more, or, have me instead. I'll gladly do it, with all my heart." I felt all the grief in her voice as she continue talking and it was making my head heavy and my atmosphere even heavier.

Kita ko ang pangnginig ng kanyang mga kamay na nakapatong sa salamin ng kabaong tanda ng kanyang matinding dalamhati. Wala talaga akong nasabi. Kahit gusto ko man pagaanin ang kanyang loob alam impossible. Wala na sigurong mas sasakit pa sa isang ina na makita ang kanyang anak sa loob ng kabaong. Napansin ko ang paglapit ng isang lalake sa aming kinaroroonan. Niyakap niya si Mrs. Fretzer dahil nagsimula na itong humagulgol. Sa nakikita ko ay ito ang ama ni Asia. Kapansinpansin din dahil may hawig sila kapag nakatagilid.

"She left us Ril," sabi pa niya sa akin nang may nginig ang boses bahang gumagalaw ang mga balikat.

"Hush now, honey. She wouldn't be pleased you cry like that." Pag-aalo ni Mr. Fretzer sa kanyang asawa. Kitang kita rin ang sobrang sakit sa kanyang mga na parang nagbabadya na rong lumabas ang mga luha. Lumingon siya sa akin at binigyan ako ng isang malungkot na ngiti.

"I know, Thom, but –"

"I know, I know but she won't be happy seeing you cry. Rill, we'll just go to the room" Baling ni Mr. Fretzer sa akin.

"Wait," and she rushed to where the microphone was placed. "For the final time, let me sing first my daughter first."

Nang ibinaling ko ang aking mata kay Mr. fretzer, kita ko sa buo niyang bukha ang labis na kalungkutan habang nakatitig sa umuiyak niyang asawa.

Lumapit muli si Mrs. Fretze to where she left us and faced the lifeless daughter. "My little A." I heard her breathe so deep and hollow in the microphone she was holding before deliberated a hum.

"I will charm Demeter's daughter,

I will charm the lord of the dead,

Moving their hearts with my melody.

I will bear her away from Hades."

Madamdaming simula niya. The song doesn't sound familiar but the lyrics were and it's sending shiver in my spine. She paused for a while to catch her breath because of her sob.

"O gods who rule the dark and silent world,

To you all born of a woman needs must come.

All lovely things at last go down to you.

You are the debtor who is always paid.

A little while we tarry up on earth.

Then we are yours forever and forever.

But I seek one who came to you so soon.

The bud was plucked before the fower bloomed.

I tried to bear my loss but I couldn't bear it."

She paused for a while to catch her breath because of her sob. Napatanga ako sa kanyang pagkanta. Gustong manlambot ng anking mga tuhod sa mga linyang ginagamit ng kanta, lalo na ang huling linya iyang iyon bago huminto saglit para huminga. Wala ng tono ang huling linyang iyon kundi para inihahayag niya na lang ito kay Asia. Ramdam ko ang pagtubig ng aking mga mata sa naririnig kong kanya. Rinig ko na rin ang mga hagulgol ng iba sa aming likuran. Dama ng lahat ng natunghayan ang pighati ng isang ina sa pagkawala ng kanyang anak.

"Love was too strong a god. O king, you know

If that old tale men tell is true, how once

The flowers saw the rape of Proserphine.

Then weave again for sweet Eurydice

Life's pattern that was taken from the loom.

Too quickly. See, I ask a little thing,

Only that you will lend, not give, her to me.

She shall be yours when her years' span in full."

I really don't know what feel and how to handle my feeling when I'm seeing this mother in front of me begging invisible being to return her daughter to life. Patuloy ang kanyang iyak habang kumakanta. Niyakap na siyang muli ni Mr. Fretzer na nagsimula na ring tumulo ang luha.

"Drew iron tears down Pluto's cheek,

And made Hell grant what Love did seek."

Halos hindi na niya nabigkas ang hiling linya dahil mas lalo ng lumakas ang kanyang iyak. My heart was crashing as hell as I looked at her. Para tuloy bumalik ang alaala ko noong ako rin ang nawalan at iniwan.

"We'll just go now, Rill. She's up all night and has not eaten anything until now." Baling ni Mr. Fretzer sa akin. Marahil ay para na ring pigilan ang nagsisimulang maging histerical na asawa.

I gave him a nod and a small smile. "I understand. Condolence, Sir." I turned my gaze to Mrs. Fretzer and held her hands, "Don't be sad. Asia didn't leave. She's everywhere now." I don't know if I'm consoling the lost mother or myself.

Credits to Mythology (Timeless Tales of gods and heroes)