Cold-hearted Girl

CHAPTER 40: HER POV

NAT POV

"Everything will be alright Nat."

Lahat sila, yan lagi ang sinasabi. Nakaakabingi na nga e. Nakakasawa.

"Hindi lang ikaw ang nasasaktan Nat, kami din. Lahat tayo pare-pareho lang na miserable ngayon."

Hindi ko naman pinagdadamot sa kanila ang magluksa. Oo miserable din sila ngayon pero walang tutumbas sa pagiging miserable ko. Hindi nila alam kung gaano sobrang kasakit mawalan ng isang tao na andyan lage para sa'yo. Ng taong mahal na mahal mo higit pa sa buhay mo.

Hindi ko alam kung paano nagagawa nila Tita Shar na tanggapin ang pagkawala ni Chrsyler? Hindi ko alam kung ganun ba sila kalakas o ganito talaga ako kahina para hindi kayanin ang pagkawala niya.

................
Papunta akong university ngayon. Kung iniisip niyong si Tita Shar ang nakapagconvince sakin humabol sa graduation, well you're wrong.

It takes a version of me to beat me.

<flashback>

"There's still time Nat. You can catch up. I already talked to your Dean and told me that he'd let you finish all those requirements and tests that you haven't take and submitted. You're 2 months away from graduation Nat. Please, if not for me, at least, do this for your family.... for Chrysler.

Anak. It's time to move on. He'll never come back. Tanggap na namin yun. Sana pati ikaw din." -Tita Shar

Alam ko naman e. Alam ko yun. Nahihirapan lang talaga ako magmove on.

Kaya sinabi ko na lang na pagiisipan ko para tigilan na nila ako kulitin.

Alam ko naman kasi na pinapakiusapan lang nila mama si Tita Shar para kausapin ako.

The following day, haaay. Si Paul naman ang nagungulit. Psh.

"Alam mo Nat --- " - Paul

"Hindi namin alam kung ano pa ang gagawin para matulungan ka magmove on. Yan. Yan ang sasabihin mo diba? Memorize ko na mga tanong niyo sakin. Nakakasawa na sagutin ang paulit-ulit na tanong."

"Tss. Wag ka nga feeling Nat. Sasabihin ko lang naman na.... Alam mo Nat, pumangit ka at parang lalo pa pumayat at parang -- " - Paul

"G*go! Nagpunta ka lang ba dito para laitin ako?!!! F.U Paul!"

"Hahaha!! But seriously Nat, here it goes. Hmm. Would you mind if Clarence would fall in love with you all over again?"

"No."

"Would you mind Eryk dropping out so he can still manage the dance troup while you're not around?"

"No. Wait. What. Where the hell did these questions came from?"

"That's none of your business Nat."

"What?! Paul --- "

"The biggest question is, can you still handle another pain if one of us died?"

"Of course Not anymore. Look. What do you wanna say?"

"Well, those questions I asked might happened IF you won't do this. Go back to school Nat. Live again. Yes, we've all been trying to convince you and alam ko nagsasawa ka ng pakinggan kami ng paulit-ulit. Pero ibahin mo ako Nat, I won't stop convincing you even if it takes me forever. Mangungulit ako Nat, anytime, anywhere. You know me Nat. If you get what I want, I also get what I want. And I want you to go back to school. Whether for your own good or you'd only do this for Chrysler or just because of any other reasons, its okay.