BEEN AWAY

eight | crazy and crazier

*TRIGGER WARNING*
THIS CHAPTER DIVES INTO A MENTAL ILLNESS
THERE MAY BE PARTS THATS ARE TRIGGERING

Coral Gables, Florida📍
Zayn

Three days—72 hours, 4,320 minutes, 259,200 seconds. That's how many days have passed since Zayn found out he potentially has a child in the world. Three longs days.

That's also how much time has passed since he spoke to Brienna.

She's been reaching out to him, texting and calling him nonstop. He just hasn't responded. And his absence hasn't been intentional, he genuinely didn't mean to ignore her but he can't help it.

It's been a lot trying to process for him and it's taking an extreme toil on his mental health. He has completely abandoned his prescription medicine and has resorted to self medicating. He's been smoking multiple times a days, which would usually calm him down but nothing is helping. He anxiety is through the roof. 

And the never ending calls from Brie, Amir, and his parents aren't helping.

Zayn leans back in against the headboard to relax but his mind continues to run rampant.

You're a deadbeat.

You have a daughter.

How can a crazy person raise a child.

She's going to know you're pathetic.

You're crazy.

This is pointless

What about you're daughter?

This is all pointless.

Zayn grabs his head and shakes it roughly, almost trying to push the thoughts away but it's like they just get louder and louder the more he tries.

Everyone's looking at you, they know.

They all know you're a failure.

His eyes dart around the room and suddenly he seem hundred pairs of eyes staring at him from every direction. Squeezing his eyes shut, he tries to drown out the noise in his mind but none of his techniques are working.

He stands up and starts pacing around the room in circles. His eyes are open but he's not looking at anything in particular as his eyes turn in every direction. The eyes in every direction he turns.

Don't trip over that.

Go get a drink.

You never gave your daughter a drink.

No body cares.

In the midst of his episode, he doesn't hear Amir knocking on the door or notice him watching through the door.

Startled by his cousins actions, Amir stands in the doorway and watches Zayn walk in circles with his eyes glossy. His hazel eyes never stray from his cousin as concern starts to settle in.