T H E O T H E R J A C K; J J *short story*

17 ♠

×"it's hard to love yourself, when no one else does"×

back to black: i forgot who sings this lol

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the sad thing is, in the past three weeks. jack and monica felt more alive in all their twenty years of living.

years of growing up, wishing for a brighter day only to get rain out when the sun went away.

wanting someone to come and take away the pain, the silent depression, screaming in silence, crying for help.

"do you remember how you were before all of this?" jack asked monica, she smiled.

"yes, but not vaguely. after numerous times of trying to end my life, my memory is blotchy" she deadpaned.

"but, i do remember a christmas morning, my dad, my mom. all of us sitting at the kitchen table. smiling and laughing. you know, that day was the last day my dad told me he loved me. my mom was the best thing that happened to me" she smiled.

"we went out at night to look at all the christmas lights, the day after. she died. and so did i"

she sniffled, wiped her eyes and smiled weakly at jack, "what about you?"

jack smiled, looking at the ground. "i remember mine very vaguely. don't to what we ate, what we did, what we were wearing" he said, his attention still pointed toward the ground.

"it was me and jack, when he was my best friend" jack paused, looking at monica. the pain evident in his voice and eyes "we were going out for my birthday" he started back up.

"jack had been saying how it was gonna be so cool and it was. we did things we always done, we hung out, we went to the arcade, even met a few girls" he smiled.

"how old were you" monica shyly asked, "fourteen"

"it was the last day we were actually close, because a week after, sam moved in next door"

"they took my best friend away, turned him against me. he helped me with my problems, he helped me find a way out!" jack cried.

"and he left me, he left me in the shadows. he left me in his shadow"

monica took hold of jack's hand. "he dumped our friendship down the drain, he left, and as he closed the door on me. my demons opened them"

jack turned his wrist, revealing the scars. "these are the ones i did the month he left. he stopped hanging out with me, i was their punching bag. after so long of saying words don't hurt, they started to" he cried.

"no matter how hard i try to shake this feeling, the shake my demons away. i always go back to black"