What Ever Happen To Holding Me Close And Never Letting Go? [completed]

This Can Mean Everything Or Nothing At All

Can you hear the silence?

Can you see the dark?

Can you fix the broken?

Can you feel... can you feel my heart?

Can you help the hopeless?

Well, I'm begging on my knees,

Can you save my bastard soul?

Will you wait for me?

I'm sorry brothers,

So sorry lover,

Forgive me father,

I love you mother.

Can you hear the silence?

Can you see the dark?

Can you fix the broken?

Can you feel my heart?

Can you feel my heart?

Can you feel my heart?

I'm scared to get close and I hate being alone.

I long for that feeling to not feel at all.

The higher I get, the lower I'll sink.

I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim.

I'm scared to get close and I hate being alone.

I long for that feeling to not feel at all.

The higher I get, the lower I'll sink.

I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim.

I'm scared to get close and I hate being alone.

I long for that feeling to not feel at all.

The higher I get, the lower I'll sink.

I can't drown my demons, they know how to swim.

Can you feel my heart?

Can you hear the silence?

Can you see the dark?

Can you fix the broken?

Can you feel... can you feel my heart?

I fold the paper up and set it in my back pocket and I open the small box. A necklace lays there in the pattern of Sempiternal. I put it around my neck.

Eight years. Eight years I've known oliver. Five years since he broke up with me and I'm still grieving. Truth is, every time he sends me gifts, it throws me back into depression. Everytime I feel right again, to face the world, he does shit like this and throws me back into the hole.

I have no friends. My friends were Oliver friends. I'm not fond of American people. I have a crappy ass job as a model and I'm still waiting to hear back for possibly modeling for Aspire & Create. If I get it, I would have to move to America. It may not be all that bad since it means, a new start, a new me.

But, I still have yet to hear back from Austin Carlile himself. He did say it would be a few months, after tour dates. But I don't know what to do for the next months. I don't have a TV. I broke it five years ago. I have a phone, but I have no contacts, no apps, no anything. I don't want it. Why would I? To be reminded of my faluire? The reason why Oliver broke up with me?