After about ten minutes of just riding the elevator, ignoring the random people who get on and off, I reach the first floor, walk out the front door, and don’t look back.
Okay, maybe I look back once or twice...and then maybe I think about Mackenna the whole way home...and then a little bit the rest of the day, but I don’t wish I could see her again, or miss holding her hand...or...or wonder what it’s like to play soccer with her...
Okay, fine! I miss her hand, and wish I could play with her, and speak to her, and even just see her again, but I can’t stand being around her! Not anymore! Not with her father...!
I stop myself when I’m ready to roll on the floor and start bawling. No one’s home right now but me. My mom’s at a conference and Billy’s God knows where and will be for about a week, I’m guessing, but still. Guys don’t cry.
The doorbell rings. I scramble up and to my window. Opening the curtain just a crack, I peer down to see who is at the door. Of course, it’s the one person I can’t stop thinking about. Mackenna rings the doorbell again. She takes a step back, and then after a few seconds rings it again. After ringing five times, and knocking three, she gives up. She walks the short way to her house, and stops right in front of her garage. She turns, and even though I know she can’t from where she’s standing, it feels like she knows I’m here. I shut the curtain as fast as I can, but I still feel like her ice blue eyes are staring right at me, watching me, wondering.
*******
It’s June thirteenth. Six days have passed since I met Mackenna Clark. Every day, Mackenna returns to my house, knocking and waiting. Every day, she leaves, disappointed. Every day, I stay huddled inside my room, feeding on granola bars and cold pizza.
I don’t understand myself. Finally, someone wants to be my friend. But I stay up in this smelly old hole and ignore her. It’s noon. I’m just finishing up my last chocolate chip granola bar and thinking that I need to make a trip downstairs to re-stock. I hear a small thud coming from outside. And another. I hear three small thuds before I open my window and stick my head out to look. Just across the street, Mackenna Clark is kicking a soccer ball into her garage.
A shiver of envy rolls down my spine. I haven’t played soccer in at least three weeks! ‘And if you go right now, you’ll have someone to play with...’ A voice in my head tells me. It’s sooo tempting! But I know I can’t. ‘Why not?’ I’ve almost forgotten why not. As if hearing the voice in my head, Mackenna stops kicking the ball and turns toward my window. It’s too late for me to pretend like I’m not here. Though she doesn’t move, I can feel her eyes beckoning me outside. Like the idiot I am, I grab my cleats from my closet and run out into the amazing summer heat. I don’t even bother to shut the front door all the way. How pathetic, she turns her eyes on me and I come running like a slave! But at the same time, I don’t care. The next thing I know, I’m across the street, my cleats are on, and I’m face to face with Mackenna, gazing into a fantastic blue.
“Hi,” I whisper. I can’t help it. Without breathing, I gently reach my hand toward her face, and tuck a stray wisp of hair behind her ear. Mackenna is frozen solid. I quickly pull my hand back to my side, and think about the huge mistake I just made. A silence falls between us. I don’t know what to say.
“What took you so long?” She whispers to me.
