Heal Me

Chapter 24

They were on their way home, a complete yet unburdening silence between them. Evangeline was looking out the window, watching streets and trees and people flash before her eyes, and relishing in the moment.

For this was the first time in her life when she truly felt like she could be happy someday. This was the first time she lived in the present and did not let the past haunt her...

 

And now that Damon took her to his mother's and baby sister's graves and told her everything and cried in her light pink sweater, soothed by her lilac perfume, Evangeline felt as if a horrible weight has been lifted off of her shoulders.

 

Everything was peaceful now and quiet... but the wonderfully rare and unique kind of quiet that made her want to sing and laugh and scream in the cold afternoon air and run around foolishly and catch the sunset and take a deep breath of the night and feel complete... And she quite liked this kind of quiet.

 

So, busy with dreamily observing the world of the small neighborhood of Scarborough, she pretty much ignored Damon, who was glancing at her with the corner of his eye and silently beating his fingers against the steering wheel.

 

'How can she feel so... at ease about this?' he was thinking, frustrated that he she did not tell him why she let those two little objects at the graves and neither what she thought about him now that she knew...

 

'She will despise me... I know she will.'  Damon muttered in his head. At least why not have the decency to tell him that from the very start, meaning now. After so many rejections and after so little time, he had grown trust for her; he had mustered up the courage to pour his heart out to her and now Evangeline kept quiet and acted with what seemed like indifference?

'That's what I told her to do, genius! I said "Shut up!" and she does what I wanted.' Damon recalled and mentally slapped himself. He glanced one more time at her and opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out because he just did not know what to say to her or what to ask... 

'Do you hate me now?'

 
 

'Are you afraid of me?'

 

 

'Are you going to stop talking to me?' 

 'If so, should I delete your number from my phone?'

 

 

  
No, he couldn't say those things... not now, at least. It just felt wrong - to spoil this calm moment, that is. But Evangeline heard when he opened his mouth and saw his indecisive reflection in the glass so, without moving her whole body, she turned her head to look at him with a slight smile on her face.

"Did you want to say something?" she asked, watching him with compassion and love in her eyes, for she loved him.

 

She loved Damon...

 

Evangeline loved Damon dearly and it was the sort of love she had never expected to find in her heart after only two weeks of knowing each other. It was the sort of love that opened her eyes to all the things she simply did not notice or refused to see before, it was the sort of love that gave her strength and will to fight the past and not the present, it was the sort of love that surprised and confused and overwhelmed her all at once...

 

And she quite liked this sort of love.

 

For she loved him but was not in love with him. And that was a striking difference.

 

"Uhm, no... I... Ugh!" he exhaled, a frown appearing on his face. "I just want you to say something..." he mumbled timidly as he parked the car in front of her house. He had insisted on driving all the way to her house, despite her saying that it was okay if he left her at the bus station where she usually waited.

 

Evangeline chuckled silently and slightly rolled up the left sleeve of her sweater to look at the time. Her watch showed 6:10 P.M. and, just like that time when she bought the two cappuccinos, her smile was mischievous yet contained.

 

"I can't think of anything I should say, except: 'Come in for dinner!'." she said, smiling widely at Damon's surprised face. She was sure he would react that way. She would probably do too if it were the other way around.

 

"Eva-"

 

"Addy asked me about you." she cut him off with a sweet look on her face, a look he could hardly resist. He only gazed into her eyes and just like that, his worries about the fact that she knew what happened to his family disappeared.

 

'God, what is this girl doing to me? She'll always be a surprise.' Damon thought amused. He let that emotion flash on his face in the form of a closed-mouth smile which kind of reminded her of a smirk. But it was not what she wanted. She wanted a true, careless and happy smile... she wanted a grin and laugh and she would not give up until she had those from him.

"You already met my mom. My dad is just as nice." she smiled back at him. "And he sure likes food so there'll be plenty."

 
 

"Eva, it's-... I just don't want to intrude and-" Damon said and, again, he was not let to finish his sentence because she burst into laughter. And it was beautiful... so clear and colorful. Damon just watched her laugh, an embarrassed smile written across his face, until her chuckles died down.

"Ever since I met you, who has been doing all the intruding?" Evangeline smiled, her cheeks rosy from laughing. She moved her hand towards Damon's, gripped it from underneath, feeling its warmth, and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

 

"Come on. They'll be very happy to meet you. Addy couldn't stop talking about that little star you gave him." she said, looking up into his eyes for an answer. Evangeline really hoped it would be 'yes' because she felt that the day was not over yet.

But Damon thought the exact opposite. He was so emotionally tired... So many things happened today, so many tears were shed. But were those not enough?