Misfit (Phan AU)

Chapter Twenty-Nine

I could respect the effort, certainly, though really I was more thankful for the pause from the onslaught of information she was rambling through so quickly. She didn't quite understand the time limit set on leaving messages, thus she seemed to rush as much as possible to say everything before she got cut off by the tone.

That meant the pause was a brief one though, the hectic slew of words starting up all over again after just a couple short seconds of peace.

"Well, I was just calling to let you know I was thinking about you really. And to wish you well for the upcoming year, of course! Actually, why don't you tell that bitter shut-in roommate of yours that I'm wishing him well too? He could probably use the positivity." I opened my mouth immediately to protest the negative way she referred to him, before realizing with a scowl that it wouldn't make a difference in the slightest. Even assuming she was still on the opposite end of the line, it's not like she'd listened to me in the past any other time that I'd gone out of my way to correct her problematic behavior toward my friend.

Besides, this was probably one of the nicer things she'd said while on the topic of Dan, maybe I should be appreciating the unusual good aspects of the sentiment rather than the usual bad ones. At least she was wishing him well for a change, rather than listing off the endless reasons I'd be better off looking into a different apartment and a new roommate.

"So, that's all... be sure to call your dear old mother back whenever you get this. I need reassurance that I'm not the only one missing the days when you were always around to talk to." The click resounded immediately as she finished speaking, leaving me to ward off a responding smile to her hasty way of doing things. It was odd how horribly her and Dan got along, considering they had such a similar brash way of dealing with anything they didn't understand. You'd think they'd find common ground with each other.

I suppose that's where their similarities ended though. She was the most outspoken and upfront person I knew when it came to expressing emotions, whereas Dan would near think himself to death before uttering a word about how he felt. I wasn't sure if I had a strict preference for either method. In some ways it'd be nice to know where I stood with him more often, but constantly being updated on where a person's thoughts are at can be hectic. It's probably for the best to just let them figure things out their own way, if it's what they're most comfortable doing then they should stick to it.

Even if it leaves me lost half the time and frustrated the times I'm not.

I grimaced, the train of thought inevitably bringing me back around to what I'd been trying not to think about since waking. Who I'd been trying to avoid thinking about, more accurately.

He was just a room over, it's not like it was easy to pretend he didn't exist when he existed so very close to me. Besides, it was impossible to pretend I was unaware of the situation, not when I'd literally woken up on the floor as an outcome of my poor decisions last night.

Well, they weren't exactly decisions, it's not like I'd traipsed through the apartment doors with intentions of burning the place to a crisp. And I definitely hadn't pulled up to the building with plans to drive Dan away so badly that I felt nervous just leaving the confines of my room in fear that I'd run into him in the halls of my own home.

Not for my sake, mind you, I was well-aware that he was more bark than bite and I was at no risk if we happened to run into each other. It was him I was worried for, painfully so.

In the final moments of our exchange last night it had seemed like it pained him to even look at me, like he physically couldn't get away from the situation fast enough. I didn't want to have him look at me like that again, not ever, so if keeping my distance was the way to achieve as much then I'd do it willingly for both of our sake's.