Now Is The Time

Chapter 9

"You know you have to be careful with the management. Eventhough yours may be different from the usual relationship that's banned for idols, I'm afraid they might still disapprove of it all the same. I think it's better for you guys to not risk it."

     This is true. Our management has always been very cool with us, especially K-san who we have come to look to as an uncle. But we're still idols so it's pretty unlikely that they will approve of us dating. In fact, they might even react harsher since we're members of the same group.

"This is going to be hard," Moa whines.

"Well, you're just going to be have to be grown-up about it and try your best," Su-chan says.

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I am in bed and my mind is wandering around, going nowhere in particular. I hear Moa calling me softly.

"Yui, are you still awake?"

"Yeah. What is it?"

"I can't sleep. Can I come sleep with you?"

"Sure," I say as I shift and make room for her. She comes in and snuggles close to me. I look over at Su-chan whose bed is next to Moa's bed which in the middle. She is fast asleep with a book over her face.

"It feels like it's been forever since we last slept together like this," Moa whispers. We are lying face to face.

"Yeah," I reply, trying to remember. "Let's see, the last time was... oh. Right..."

The night I broke down. I did not want to recall that.

"That was some night... Now that I think about it, you still haven't told me why you were like that. Do you think you can tell me now?"

"I kind of already told you the reason, at least the biggest part of it, when I confessed."

"I don't understand. You had feelings for me but you knew that we were going to be separated in the future so that made you sad. Is that it?" She looks confused. Adorable. I just have to hug her.

"Kind of. You see," I say as I hug her tightly, "I had a taste of what it would be like for me without you in my life. You remember we took a bath together that night, right? Well, after you went out it suddenly felt very very empty. I could still remember the feeling of your body on mine but you were nowhere near me. There was a void in the room, or rather the room itself became a void, that was what I felt. I'm not sure but I think it was that feeling that brought on thoughts about the future. Imagining life without you made me break down like that. You must have been surprised, huh, seeing me like that? Sorry I made you worry."

     She loosens herself a bit from my embrace. She brings her hands to my face, cupping both my cheeks and pulls me in for a kiss. I am a bit surprised but in no time I'm melting into it. This kiss is different from the previous one. It is much more soft, much more tender. I feel accepted, like she's taking in all my thoughts and feelings, my whole self, under her embrace, into her, telling me that it's okay, that everything will be okay. She breaks the kiss and looks warmly into my eyes.

"I love you, Yui. I want you to know that, okay?"

My heart squeezes. I feel my eyes getting wet. I take her lips in mine again and kiss her with everything I am, letting the kiss evaporate all the bad things in the world. She kisses me back with the same tenderness as before. As we break away she gently wipes the tears from my eyes.