Now Is The Time

Chapter 8

     While Moa is changing into her PJs I sort out my thoughts, planning ahead for what I am going to say to her. Though I still don't know what to do about the whole confession mess, I do know that I have to apologise to her, and find out what is bothering her. As she finishes she lies face down onto her bed and I approach her.

"Can we talk?" I ask standing near her bed. I kind of feel awkward. She looks up at me with an unreadable expression.

"Sure." She sits up and moves a bit further back towards the headboard, leaving room for me to sit at the bottom of the bed.

"First, I want to apologise for everything I've put you through these past few days, and for making you think about unnecessary things," I start as I sit down facing her.

She sits hugging her knees and waits for me to continue.

"You must be disappointed in me for being so wishy-washy about my feelings. I wouldn't blame you if you've come to hate me..."

"Stop assuming that I hate you," she says, her voice steely.

I am a bit taken aback because her tone is something I've never heard from her before.

"I'm sorry."

"And stop apologising." Her voice has become warmer again but she hasn't looked at me once during our conversation.

"I'm... I...I know I've made you angry..."

"I'm not angry."

"Then please tell me what you're feeling."

"There's nothing to tell. I feel good."

"I know that's not true. You've been acting different ever since...since that morning we talked. Please tell me what's going on?"

"I don't know what to tell you."

I am at a loss as to how I should continue. We stay silent for a moment, then I recall what Su-chan said.

"Are you disappointed with me...for putting you through that only to take everything back at the end?"

"I don't know if I am." She pauses for a while, then says, "I just know that it hurt when you said you were taking it all back."

"Because it felt like I abandoned you?"

She stays quiet for a minute or so, thinking. She still has her eyes down, not meeting my gaze. She hugs her knees tighter.

"I suppose. That and...betrayal, I guess. I was happy to know you loved me. I thought about it and I...um...." She releases her arms from her knees and she sits straight up, cross-legged, and looks at me. "When I kissed you I felt something in the kiss, okay? Something I hadn't felt before. The sensation remained on my lips for the longest time. I didn't know what it was but I was starting to think maybe I felt the same way you did. I was thinking of ways to make sure but then in the morning you took everything back. You left me dangling. I was sure it was all because of the kiss, as I was now sure of my feelings for you. If I hadn't had feelings for you, it wouldn't have hurt that much. After kissing me you came to realise that your feelings were after all, not romantic feelings, just at the same time as you made me aware of mine."

Am I hearing her right?

"So what you're saying is...?" I trail off.

"I'm saying that I have feelings for you, romantic feelings. But you don't have to worry ab...why are you grinning? Are you seriously laughing at me right now?"

She is starting to look pissed off.

"No, I'm not laughing at you, silly. I'm happy you feel the same way I do," I say as I move closer and embrace her.

She appears to be stunned but snaps out of it right away and hugs me back.

"What do you mean? Aren't you...uh... Really? You haven't had a change of heart? You still feel the same way?" she asks, her voice quivering slightly.

I hug her even tighter.

"I can never change the way I feel about you no matter how hard I may try, not that I have or ever will."

Then she suddenly breaks our embrace and pushes me in front of her, both her hands on my shoulders.

"Then why did you do that to me? Why did you take back your confession?"

"I thought I was causing you trouble, making you think about whether you should start a relationship with me or not. It seemed like I was putting you in a tight spot unnecessarily. I'm sorry."

"You have no idea ho...I seriously thought I had scared you off with my kiss," she says pulling me back into her embrace.

"It will be a cold day in hell when that happens," I laugh.

We stay like this for a moment.

"Then can I kiss you again?"

My heart feels like someone is squeezing it. I move away from the embrace and look at her. How can someone so perfect be saying that to me? How did I get to be so lucky? How lucky can one get to have the person they love look at them like that? I feel my hands being squeezed. I realise they are in hers.

"So?" She's smiling at me.

"Huh?"

"Can I?"

"Oh. Why are you asking?" I say as I lean in towards her. She meets me half-way, and our lips touch for the second time.

     I feel her soft lips pressing onto mine, as her hands move to my waist holding me. I can hear my heart thumping inside my ears. She starts moving her lips and I follow suit. The softness of her lips combined with her fruity scent is making my head swirl. I reach out pulling her closer, wanting more of her. She deepens the kiss and it feels like I'm about to melt right here in her arms. We break the kiss when it becomes difficult for us to breathe. I lean my head on her shoulder and try to steady my breaths. She too is breathing hard, her chest rising up and down. I look up at her after a while and she is smiling at me. My heart leaps at the sight.

Just then the bathroom door opens, making us jump. Su-chan slowly comes out, assessing the atmosphere of the room. She sees us sitting on Moa's bed and she looks at me questioningly. I flash her a reassuring smile, indicating that everything's fine. It seems she understands and she smiles. Then I notice her studying us, the position we're in, and her eyes widening. I realise we haven't quite moved away from each other. We turned our heads when we saw her come out but our bodies are still facing each other. Moa has one arm on my waist and another hand is on my thigh, while I have one hand on her shoulder. I quickly move my hand and turn my body away.

"Oh my god! Really?!" Su-chan squeals.

Oh god, no. I look at Moa and she looks surprised.

"Tell me. It happened, right? Right?" she says, not hiding her excitement at all as she approaches us.

I don't know what to say. I just turn red sitting there while Moa stares at her dumbfounded.

"Come on, don't leave me hanging. Tell me everything."

"What are you talking about?" Moa asks.

"What do you mean what am I talking about? I'm talking about this...this right here...the two of you..," she says waving her hands in front of us.

Oh, Moa seems to be saying. I swear I can almost hear the 'click' inside her head as she finally gets it.

"So..., are you guys like a 'thing' now?" Su-chan asks wiggling her eyebrows.

"No we're not a 'THING'," Moa sneers in reply. "We're a COUPLE," she proclaims, putting an arm over my shoulders and pulling me close to her.

"Oooohhhh...," Su-chan croons.

Oh god, Moa. Are you not in the least bit embarrassed? You're killing me. I just know my face is beyond red by now, and I can't seem to look up. At the same time though, I am giddy with euphoria.

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