Deliverance (DS #1)

Prologue

Alessandro,

Most of the times, I would wake up in the middle of the night, and find your spot in our bed unoccupied. Hindi iilang beses kong hiniling na sana nandito ka sa tabi ko para nayayakap kita sa tuwing nahihirapan na'kong bumalik sa pagkakatulog. Sometimes, I can't help myself but to cry. I have no husband here beside me. 

Most of the times, I would take care of our son and find it exhausting to take care of him alone. Hindi iilang beses kong inisip na sana nandito ka para sabay nating inaalagaan ang anak natin. 

Most of the times, I wondered if the pain I've been feeling now is all worth it? Should I keep on going? But looking back through all that we've been through, this is only nothing...I guess. I have been patient for a long time, I have endured so much heartaches in the past. Ngayon pa ba ako susuko?

God has showed me a lot of blessings amidst all the challenges that I barely won. He is the main reason why in everything that happened to us, I never stopped loving you. He is the love that I can offer to you aside from the love that my heart can give you. I never gave up on you because I would always remember how He did not give up on me.

Sandro, I will always pray for you. I will always see and believe the good in you. I will always choose to love you continuously. They won't ever agree to me but you were the best thing that ever happened to me. How come? When all you had showed me was the worst version of you?

Simple. Because of you I have learned that love hurts but heals and forgives, that love can crash you but it will continue to understand, and that love can harm you but it will always endure. We truly know how to love when we love the unlovable. And loving the unlovable is tough. You made me stronger and I never thought that I would ever love like this. Unconditional.

That's why, I'll wait for you, still. Waiting is the most difficult thing to do. But in waiting we grow, we mature, and we become better than before. Most people don't understand that in the waiting process, God's molding us into a person—a deserving person, that can receive and handle what we have been waiting for a long time. That He is turning us into a more resilient person that can face the next step after.

I love you, Alessandro. Even if the world sees me as a martyr or a masochist or stupid for continuing loving you, I will always keep our promise to the one who bonded us together.

For better or for worse, Alessandro. I'll stay. I'll hold on. For better or for worse, I'll love. I always have the hope that you'll change. I know you will. I trust you will. Not because you can but because God can.

He can and will cast out all the darkness in you if you'll just ask Him to. Therefore I have hope. Everyone can be saved. Everyone can have deliverance.

Alessandro, I'll wait until you can come home.

Your wife,

Patricia Aurora Leona delos Santos

***

Follow my official FB Pages:

FGirlWriter and C.D. De Guzman

Twitter & IG: fgirlwriter_cd

~~~

Join our family!

FB Group: CDisciples

Twitter: CDisciplesHome

~~~

Visit our PubCamp:

Facebook: FGW Publishing Camp

Twitter: FGWPubCamp