Sillage ▶ Bob Morley

[01] Botched Number

reily: hey, we're running a bit behind here - any chance you could walk wilbur for me tonight??

unknown: sorry but i think u have the wrong number. but since i'm an avid dog lover, i would hate for poor wilbur to be stranded, just thought i'd text back to let u know

reily: shit sorry, new phone so i was typing in the number. on the other hand, wilbur and i both thankyou (btw he's actually a pig)

unknown: really??? a pig?? what kind of a pig gets walked?! 😂😂 also, dont be sorry this is the most interesting thing that's happened to me all week

reily: the extremely sophisticated and slightly chubby kind ;) he even has a collar and leash. myself and wilbur are honoured to serve as some entertainment

unknown: well that is some pig. some terrific, radiant, humble pig ;)

reily: a charlotte's web fan?? you're either a farmer or a librarian

unknown: well you picked up on the reference plus you're the one who owns a pig so perhaps you're a farmer/librarian

reily: i dabble in both

unknown: seriously?

reily: no. not seriously. its called sarcasm you loon - what about you?

unknown: im neither farmer nor a librarian

reily: let me take a wild guess, an underemployed dog walker whos been sitting on their phone all night in the hope that someone mysterious and exiting will ask you to tend to something more interesting than a poodle?

unknown: awe shit you've caught me

reily: really though... whats your deal?

unknown: asks the random stranger on the other side of her phone ;)

reily: says the one still replying - and how do you know i'm a girl??

unknown: easy, you recognised a quote from charlottes web

reily: well you quoted it in the first place

unknown: i have two older sisters that enjoyed hogging the tv when i was little

reily: so you're not a girl

unknown: nope, not a girl

reily: does this mean you're a creepy 60-year-old stalker using your love of animals to prey on girls still in their 20s?

unknown: damn, you've caught me again

unknown: no, i only just got out of my 20s myself

reily: shit, the scary 30. my b-days coming up soon and i'm slightly terrified.

reily: tell me mr. older-and-wiser, when you hit the big three zero do the wrinkles spontaneously hit and your eyesight worsen?

unknown: god i hope not, my producer would not be v happy

reily: hold up, producer??? you some kinda zoolander??

unknown: no, nothing like that 😂 i'm just in a small tv show, popularities growing though so these 'spontaneous wrinkles' better not kick in

reily: ohhh a celebrity ;) don't forget me and wilbur when you're big and famous and all the girls line up wanting their tits signed

unknown: i don't even know your name and you're taking the piss outta me

reily: well do you want to know my name