Void (Completed)

Chapter 12 | Conversations and Pinkeye

a/n: hiya! this book only has about three more chapters left but don't worry, i have everything already planned out ahead of me. you'll probably hate me afterwards :-)))

CRAIG TUCKER
song ; peach // the front bottoms

After suffering for about two hours with a minor headache, bad puns, cuddles, and Clyde, Token and Clyde finally left, leaving Tweek and I alone.

"So," he says.

"What?"

"What are you gonna tell Kenny?"

I turn the TV off and face my attention to Tweek, "I don't know," I shrug. "He's an...okay guy. He's pretty cool and y'know, attractive but..."

"But?"

"I don't know."

"Oh."

"Why do you care so much?" I laugh.

"It's funny because I really don't. I just wanna like, hook you guys up or-"

"Please, don't." I smile.

"Why not?" He laughs, "it'll be great, y'know."

"I don't know." I shrug again.

Tweek sighs, "how do you even feel about him? Like, attracted-wise?"

"Uh, he's a poor piece of shit," we both laugh, "but he's funny and he's so fucking bright and cheery all the time. Like he's so positive and he tries to stay positive about everything, man. He's quite a charismatic person and he- shit man, I don't know if I can handle that."

Tweek groans, "dude, come on. You need some positivity in your life!"

"I already have that."

Tweek looks at me. "What do you mean?"

"I mean you. And the guys. It's annoying as it gets but it's whatever, dude."

"Are you hitting on me, or somewhat attempting to?" Tweek raises an eyebrow.

"Nah."

Tweek gives me a look, "you a lie."

"I'm not lying!" I laugh.

"Craig, look, you need to give McCormick a chance, alright? You need to go out in the world and date other people—people who aren't me! Look, man, I love ya. I'll always love ya but you need some dick." Tweek pats my arm.

"Such an inspiration." I slowly clap my hands together. "But I know, you're totally right. I just, I'm not 100% ready."

"The fuck if you ain't. Go. Get. Some. Dick. Here, think about what you wanna do, alright? Then text me or something when you finally figure out your decision. Although I prefer you go after McCormick, he's alright." Tweek smiles.

I sigh, "fine."

I'm totally fucking screwed.

*

KENNY MCCORMICK

"Oh, hello there, Kenny. Eric's right on in his room. Although don't get too close to him, he has the pinkeye." Ms. Cartman lets me into the house.

I nod and smile at her before I make my way upstairs to Fatass's room. And damn, I had to see it to believe it.

Cartman's on his bed, crying and clutching his right eye. "Ow."

I almost want to laugh, but I hold it in. I want to be nice. Even if he acted like a dick to me the day before.

"C-Cartman?" I snort.

Cartman looks at me with his one eye—HOLY SHIT— and I can't help it, I laugh anyway.

"I'm sorry, Cartman! I'm sorry that I'm laughing. This is just pure gold right here!" I say in between laughs.

Cartman glares—or somewhat attempts to, AHA— at me, "I hope you die, dickhole."

"Okay, okay," I stop laughing, "I'm sorry. What happened again?"

"Clyde gave me pinkeye!"

"Oho, dude, I'm so sorry." I laugh a little, but make my way towards him.

"If you come any closer to me, I will give you pinkeye." Cartman warns.

"I don't care." I shrug.

"Ugh." Cartman groans.

I wrap my arms around Cartman but he wiggles his way out of my embrace, "dick."

"Ass." I retort.

"You insulted me, I don't want anything to do with you."

"You fucking acted like a dick to me yesterday!"

".....touché."

"Ha!" I sit down beside him, "so enjoy my company."

"Why are you here anyway?" Cartman croaks.

"Damn, are you that sick?" He nods. "Shit, man. Good thing I know the best way to take care of people."

"Oh no."

"Oh yes!"

"Kill yourself, Kenny."

"Cuddles and movies and probably ice cream."

"Nooooo." Cartman whines, "ooooh, ice cream."

"Yeah, motherfucker, got ya there! I told Stan and Kyle to come over but they said that they didn't want to come over here because you were nothing but a 'fat faggot little pussy so'."

"Oh, I hate those guys so much." Cartman groans. I laugh. "Anyway, go make me some ice cream, bitch."

"Get your mom to do it."

"Mooooooooooom! Can you fix Kenny and I some ice cream please!"

"Coming, Hun!"

"Sweet." Cartman grins.

*

Cartman eventually fell asleep on my chest, and there's a huge ache in my eye. But it was worth it.

I grab my phone off of the nightstand and take a couple of pictures of Cartman before sending them to the group chat Stan, Kyle, and I are in.

Heh.