Church Boys † Brendon Urie

25✝ When Life Gives You Lemons

As a child, I was never allowed to spend much time with my cousin, Elaine. She was always the one person in the family that my parents forced me to stay away from. She was the cousin who was known for sleeping around, staying out late at bars each night and getting into the things my aunt and uncle told her to stay away from. It didn't help, either, that the last time I'd seen her she was ushering me out the door to a party with a stack of all-too-short dresses in my arms. The rest of my family painted her as such a monster that I never had the chance to see how open and caring she was. It was just that none of us understood her. In all honesty, she was simply a normal person who maybe just chose to live her life differently than the rest of us did.

Having been living with her for this past week has really given me a new perspective on her. She may have made some bad decisions in the past, but she is an amazing person to talk to and a great person to get advice from. I told her everything that has been going on in my life, especially the parts involving Brendon. She asked me if I had gone to see him and I told her I had been avoiding him because I wasn't emotionally ready yet.

"If you keep using that excuse, Vanessa, you're going to convince yourself that you're never going to be ready to see him. You have to go talk to him. You even said it yourself, he isn't worth losing." I'd stared at the TV that was playing idly in the background as I let Elaine's words settle into my brain, and finally, I decided that she was right. I knew it was time to see him. We both have to face these consequences sooner or later, it might as well be together. Besides that, there was also the fact that I had begun to miss him quite intensely and I felt bad for not even having the opportunity to wish him a good recovery. Elaine tosses me her keys with a wink, and I laugh as I slip on my shoes.

On the way to Brendon's house, I decide that I was sick of torturing myself by listening to "Too Late to Apologize" play on the radio, so I stopped by the nearest chocolate shop with the intention of buying him something for his troubles. I begin browsing the aisles, tucking five different boxes of chocolates under my arm in the realization that I had absolutely no clue what Brendon liked. I figured I could gather as many options as I could and then narrow them down later. This store was slightly overpriced, and with the crumpled up ten dollar bill I had shoved down in my pocket for emergencies, I knew I had to make this cheap. As I scoured the aisles one by one, racking my brain for a single hint of what Brendon could possibly want, I hear a familiar voice ask, "Is there anything I can help you find?" Seconds later I've turned to find Ab standing behind the counter in her employee uniform, staring at me expectantly. As she realizes who I am, her face changes from a bored expression to a stunned one.

"Vanessa?"

"Ab? Oh my gosh, no one has heard from you in weeks. I didn't know you worked here. How are you doing? Are you okay?" I rambled, my scattered thoughts coming out in unorganized sentences.

She grabbed a few boxed off of the counter next to her and walked over to me, placing them each onto a shelf, "Yeah, I guess I'm as alright as I can be. At least I'm not like Dani," we took a moment of silence to ponder on what she'd said before I nodded in agreement.

"Have you heard from the other three?" I asked, fixing a box that was slipping from my grasp and picking up a box of dark chocolate mint from the shelf next to me and placing it under my arm as well.

"Not really. I haven't heard from Lindsay at all. When Dallon called me he said she was on some sort of 'vow of silence'," I nodded, "I went to see Brendon the third day he was in the hospital. He and Dallon were playing video games when I got there so I stayed for a sec and then left. I didn't want to interrupt."

"I can understand that."

"Yeah," she fixed a fallen display box on the wall next to us, "have you gone to see Brendon yet?" She asked.