Before Its Too Late( Camren fanfic)

Camila Vs. Conscious

"You say I'm pathetic when all you really did was leave. You and dad never came back for me, so I had to deal with the fucking situation however I could" I say as my k'9s come out and I walk closer to her.

"Your such a badass but in reality, your just a coward" I growl before striking at her. I feel the goggles ripped off of my face immediately and I'm met with lauren straddling me.

"Babe you have to calm down" she says and tells me to deep breath.

"No, she has so much to fucking say, put me back in that sim lauren" I growl and she looks shocked but grabs my arms.

"Camila your speaking out of anger, calm down please. Sofi is not like that in real life and you know that. She was thrilled to see you again, it's just your concious playing a part. Sofi is not the enemy in this sim, your thoughts are" she says and I nod knowing she's right. I calm down little by little and look up to her looking concerned.

"Maybe we should stop for a bit" she says and I think on it.

"Lauren I have to do this last one more than both of the two I just did" I say quietly and she frowns.

"Why" she asks and I stay quiet.

"Do you two mind if I do this one privately. I promise I won't freak out again, this one is just a little personal" I say and they both look at each other before nodding.

"Hollar when your done, I'm going to put the sim into auto so it will feed off of your own emotions and thought" the man says and I nod. They leave out of the room and I put the goggles back onto my face.

I'm in no kind of room or world related surrounding. I'm in nothing but a white surrounding. I turn to see nothing for miles and when I turn around I see......me. I watch as she looks around just as I did and she spots me and smile but I keep a straight face.

"Camila Cabello in the flesh" she says and I just watch her.

"Aren't you curious as to why I'm here or did you already know" she says and I gulp.

"Oh so rude to not introduce myself, I'm Camila cabello, your mind part that is" she says standing up and I just watch her.

"Ask me" she says touching the air and creating stuff out of it.

"Why go through all of this for so long only to keep running into dead ends" I say and she frowns.

"Camila, what is a strength of ours" she says and I sigh.

"Adaptability" I say and she smiles.

"You have been beatened by mother, abandoned by sister and father, abused by society, used by Lauren's mother, threatened by the clan..
But we can't forget suicidal by our own hands" she says sitting back down after creating the scene of me standing on the ledge of the waterfall.

"Stop" I say and she watches me.

"Camila your hiding a secret from everyone, but you can't hide it from me. I am you"

"I didn't ask for this okay, I didn't ask you for a trip down memory fucking lane" I say and she looks up frowning.

"You asked why go through so much pain. You interpret that as a question as to why life is so evil, when the real you...." she says pointing at herself and my mind.

"Knows your asking why are you still living" she says and my claws come out.

"No" I growl.

"Yes. Camila you never truly healed from any of your past. You only seem to run faster and faster but sooner or later you will have to face the past. Do you really want a break down like Lauren or become as secretive as Dinah about how you truly feel about yourself" she says and I laugh.

"I don't know what your talking about" I say and she changes the scene of me and Dinah in the car when she made me promise her to stay alive.

"Mila I need to know I won't wake up in the middle of the night again to get another call that your trying to take your life. I learned a little trick from an old friend. When you learn to not be able to love and live for yourself anymore, find something in the world, one thing as your reason worth living for" she says and looks sad

" your my reason....." I say sticking out my pinky.

" I pinky promise to live for you" i say and sewer light up, I haven't seen one of smiles in a while.

"It worked for a little while but then your mother and sofi and your father was all too much for you again, wasn't it" she says and I growl.

"You won't kill yourself. Your past the point of knowing it will work becuase you have lauren and Dinah watching you. However with mom out of the picture and no one there to hurt you...."

"DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE" I scream and she looks at me sadly.

"You hurt yourself, every chance you get and can slip away you take and you hurt yourself. Everyone has been so busy with taking care of the problems ahead that they can't see the biggest problem is right in front of them" she says and I'm lost for words. I hang my head down low in shame as she walks closer and whispers.

"What will lauren think of us when news breaks surface" she says and the sim is over. I take off my goggles and see its still an empty room. I walk out to a pacing lauren with headphones.

"Ah camila, the wall is built sound proof but I caught lauren trying to eaves drop so I gave her a special kind of ear phones that keep her from hearing even a bomb right next to her" he says and I smile while watching lauren. She sees me and walks up to me.

"Hey what's wrong" she says grabbing my face and I grab her hands while rubbing her hands.

"Your beautiful and I love you" I say shocking her but she smiles and grabs me by the waist before we start walking.

I look back and see the doctor watching me with pity and I know he knows what my last sim was about. He's not a licensed doctor to actually do anything about it but he could tell. I'm tired though, I'm tired of fighting and hiding and putting on a facade. I love lauren and at the end of the day, if she's living then so am I.