Beacon in the Darkness

24. Make Me Whole

Uncomfortable didn't even begin to describe the car ride home. Camila fidgeted in the passenger seat, peeking at her mother through her peripheral. Sinu stared out the windshield, her mouth pressed into a tight, thin line, and her eyes not moving a centimeter from the road in front of them. The look on her face conveyed she was angry, but how angry was the question of the night.

Camila chewed at her bottom lip, wanting to get the inevitable over with. She didn't care if Sinu scolded her or even if she outright yelled, the silence was worse than either of those. Her mother hadn't spoken a word since she'd demanded Camila ride home with her instead of Shawn, Michael, and Lauren.

She knew she should probably be nervous—heck, she should probably be downright terrified. But all she felt was relief, relief that finally the secret was out and they wouldn't have to hide any longer. She was also immensely happy Sinu and Alejandro hadn't been more stealthy in their entrance to the back room. Camila couldn't even imagine what Sinu would have done had she caught them in the—position—they'd been in seconds before.

Her cheeks flushed and a flare of heat shot through her as the memory floated through her mind. Shawn's lips on hers, his hands on her behind, her legs wrapped around him tightly, jagged books poking into her back. The scent of dust and ink and Shawn flooded her senses so intensely she could still smell it even now. Shaking herself out of her own head, she turned to Sinu.

"Mama—" she started, unable to stand the silence any longer, but Sinu cut her off by raising her hand.

"Karla, just—I need to think for a bit. We'll talk when we get home." She placed her hand back on the steering wheel and let out a loud breath.

Camila sighed and turned toward the window. The scenery passed by in a blur. The muted colors of fall and the bland faces of buildings mixed together, forming nothing more than a big blob in front of Camila's eyes. Concentration on anything other than the thoughts bombarding her mind was all but impossible at the moment. She wished Sinu would just say something already. The silence grated on her nerves and made her wonder what would come of this whole situation. It really couldn't be that big of a deal, could it?

People Camila's age dated all the time. Some even went out as early as the beginning of freshman year. She'd never asked much of Sinu, had never questioned a rule or even thought about it until now. The idea that her mother could tell her she couldn't see Shawn made her stomach clench in anxious anticipation. Camila knew Sinu still harbored some uneasy feelings toward him, but she'd had hope after their conversation the day before that maybe, just maybe, her mother had set aside those ideas. But from the strained look on her face now, Camila wasn't sure if that would be the case.

After several more minutes, Sinu eased the car into the driveway and shut down the engine, pausing before getting out. She lowered her gaze to her hands, picking at her fingers. With a deep breath she looked up, but instead of meeting Camila's eyes, her gaze drifted over Camila's shoulder. A determined expression fixed on her face.

Camila hesitantly looked behind her and stifled a groan when she saw Jauregui's couple just arriving home.

"Karla." Sinu's voice was low, quiet, scary. "Go wait on the porch for me."