Just eat

Part 6- Phil

Dan's POV
It had been four days since dinner with Phil's family and I've stuck to my word. I haven't eaten a crumb since. I was laying on the sofa watching TV when out of the corner of my eye I noticed Phil came in looking upset "Dan" Phil said very quietly. I got up very quickly and pulled my legs to my chest which made me dizzy.
"Yeah?" I asked, I was terrified of his response, I could feel my heart was beating through my chest, maybe he was going to break up with me because I had gotten so fat, he looked really upset and I no idea what was about to come out of his mouth. "Look... We need to talk" Phil told me. There was a silence, I was waiting for Phil to talk
"Dan, why haven't you been eating?" He asked ding ding ding. There it was. Quick Dan. Lie.
"What are you talking about? I eat three meals a day like everyone else because I'm not crazy" I said, starting to ramble,I just wanted him to believe me. I'm fat and ugly and not ready to start eating food again yet.
"Dan I'm not stupid, I watch you at dinner time. That's all you do is talk to me and you don't eat thing. What's wrong? Do you not like what I make? If it's my cooking I'll take cooking classes" Phil said with a concerned look on his face, staring at his hands the whole time but Phil's cooking wasn't the case. It was me. His food wasn't bad. I loved him cooking for me because not only did I not have to cook for myself then but it made me feel at home and safe.
"Phil no, your cooking is perfect believe me. I'm just... Feeling a little poorly and I just feel a bit sick eating large amounts" I told him. I was just digging myself a hole, I can't be poorly forever. I felt like there was a hole of guilt in my stomach from lying to Phil. I just wanted a big black hole to come and swallow me up, how much longer could I lie to Phil? I can't do this forever. He deserved to know I just didn't want to tell him, not yet.
"Dan I'm really worried, you've been ill for almost a month now. Do I need to take you to A&E? The doctors? Do you want me make you an appointment?" He said now sitting down next to me holding my hand in concern, he was still avoiding eye contact. This is where the panic started to set in, I couldn't go to the doctors, no I can't go to the doctors. They'd just tell me that I have a problem, that I weigh way too much and I should eat less.
"No Phil, I'm f-fine, I promise. I'll get better soon" I mumbled rushing my words as I started to feel panicky, I couldn't see the doctors. I'm scared.