After Freeze

Cities

NOTE: For @mysteriousvamp Hope this helps you with whatever you're going through right now :)

**********

"Hi, Bibi."

Maine snuggles further down amongst the sheets and props her phone against the pillow in front of her as RJ's handsome face appears on the screen. As soon as she hears his warm voice wash over her like a foamy wave, she feels all the muscles in her body automatically begin to relax. A far cry from the effect he had on her only five months ago, when just being in his presence caused her to tense up from head to toe and become overly self-conscious.

"Hello, Bae," she greets him back, then contorts her face into a grimace at the sound of that word, earning a deep laugh from him.

"Kumusta ka?" he asks, and she can see him settling into his own bed, adjusting his head on the pillow and rearranging his blanket. "How's the family, Pico de Loro? Kwento ka naman."

She launches into an animated account of the day's events, beginning with how big Nini has grown and how sweet she is to Maine even if the latter rarely gets to go home to Bulacan these days. RJ listens with a small smile, nodding and asking questions occasionally, for the most part content to just listen to Maine speak. Her voice has the exact same effect on him that his has on her—it soothes and calms him, and even though he's barely gotten eight hours of sleep the entire week, suddenly he doesn't feel so exhausted anymore. Five minutes into her story, Maine becomes vaguely aware that RJ's smile doesn't quite reach his eyes.

"...tapos tinulak siya ni Kuya sa pool. Galit na galit si Coleen," she finishes with a loud guffaw. RJ chuckles lightly, but once again the laughter fails to reach his eyes, and this bothers Maine. "RJ, what's wrong?"

"Hmmm? Wala. Nothing's wrong, I'm just so tired."

Maine rolls her eyes. He may be an award-winning actor, but he is a terrible liar. "Shokoy, I know you're lying. Ang obvious mo kaya. Tell me. Please."

He hesitates a beat, then slowly says, "Nabasa ko yung blog mo..."

She is surprised and flattered, but she fights to keep her expression neutral. "Talaga? Updated ka ngayon ha. Naka subscribe ka ba sa blog ko? Hahaha."

"Oo, naka subscribe ako," he frankly admits. He shrugs. "I like reading your thoughts, you don't always tell me those things."

"Okay...but why do you seem...bothered? What's wrong with what I wrote today?"

He scrunches up his nose, trying to find the right words. "There's nothing wrong with what you wrote today. It's just that...siguro nababother lang ako tuwing binabanggit mo yung New York. I mean, alam ko kasi how much you loved it there...alam ko na sobrang life-changing experience yun para sayo—and I'm happy for you—I really am. I mean, I'm happy that you got to have that experience. Pero kasi nangyari yun bago tayo nagkakilala. I wasn't a part of your life yet then, but other people were, and I guess I just feel...jealous," he finishes lamely. He shrugs again and fretfully runs a hand through his hair.

Maine smiles, shakes her head, and sighs. She understands, despite his convoluted, roundabout explanation. That emphasis on "other people"—she knows he's thinking about Miggy, and worrying that she may still be pining over her former flame. She also knows he's not the only one—her bashers frequently imply that she isn't over Miggy yet, and that the reason why she wanted to spend her Holy Week vacation in New York was to see him. Utterly ridiculous, of course, but she can see that RJ needs her reassurance.

How to make him understand? She ponders briefly to herself, before taking a deep breath and plunging into an explanation, "Alam mo RJ, ganito kasi yun. Alam ko na namimisinterpret ng mga tao yung longing ko for New York. I know what you and everybody else is thinking, and I just have to tell you—you've all got it wrong."