Fall For You (UtaPri FanFic)

X. What If...

(a/n: long time no update peeps. I hope you're still going to read this :3 )

[Shou's POV:]

"I need to disappear."

S... Satsuki... Needs to disappear?

I just stared at him with wide eyes and with my mouth slightly open.

Just when I thought of being happy with them both. I know it sounded selfish but... I want them both to be with me. Why can't that just simply happen? Is it that forbidden for the three of us to be happy?

I don't want Satsuki to go. He's there to protect Natsuki but I know he also feels lonely and he needs someone to be there for him. But just when he was about to be with that someone, he has to disappear, for the sake of the person he is protecting.

It's all for the sake of Natsuki.

"Sa..." I tried to speak but my voice came out weak so I tried again, "Satsuki..."

"Sho, this is for Natsuki's sake." He said seriously as he gently placed his hand over mine. He gave it a little squeeze and tried to smile.

His smile was so beautifully painful for me. He's smiling because he'd be saying farewell.

"So now, what I am asking for is your help." He said with his eyes getting gentle.

"My... Help?" What could I possibly help him with? I am a mere mortal, human being. I don't even know what to do anymore. My head is a freaking mess and my chest hurts in each damn beat.

He nodded at me and patted my shoulder, noticing my feelings, "I'm sorry to burden you with this kind of things, Sho. We'll talk some other time when you got better." His hand slowly slipped off my shoulder but I held his sleeve and pulled him closer.

I rested my forhead somewhere near his collar bones and whispered, "Idiot."

He didn't say anything so I continued, "I care about Natsuki..." I blinked away the tears that were attempting to fall, "And if I say Natsuki... You're part of that too."

I punched his chest weakly since I've got not energy, "Don't tell me you're burdening me. I wanted to do anything to help you even if I'm not even strong enough." I closed my eyes shut. I am so irritated, hurt, damned... it is mixed emotions.

Damn it. I have the urge to shout at Satsuki even more but that'll lead me to crying. I don't want that.

"Stupid." I whispered to Satsuki.

"Stupid." I said again, but this time, to myself.

"This is so stupid." I was about to let a tear esape but warmth came rushing into my body.

Two strong, careful arms wrapped around my small build, making me feel safe.

I melted into his embrace. Satsuki... Satsuki's the one hugging me. It just feels like Natsuki's idiotic, killer embrace.

"Ne, Sho." He whispered to my ear.

"Mm?" I asked.

"Please prove me..." He said as he loosened the hug, just enough for us to look at each other's eyes, "That I can leave Natsuki to your care."

Satsuki's expression was worried and hesitant, so I cupped his face between my palms and I gave him a reassuring smile.

"I'll do my best." I whispered.

He smiled back, "Thanks. I'll go back to Natsuki now." He said and reached out to his glasses.

We looked at each other for one last time before he wore the glasses.

How can I face Natsuki when I know his heart's condition?

"Soooo~ How's Satsuki?" Natsuki asked.

I ignored the question and slumped back on my bed, my back facing him, and closed my eyes.

"Ehhhh... you're mean, Sho-chan." He said and pouted, I guess.

"Then, I'll go now." He said it in a gentle way and stood up to leave but I reached out to the hem of his shirt.

"Nee, stay." I said, not looking at him.

He chuckled a little and said, "Hai, hai~"

He sat on the other end of the bed and rested the back of his neck on his palms.

"Thank you, Natsuki." I whispered but it was loud enough for him to hear.

He moved and placed himself beside me so I sat up.

Who told him the permission to sleep beside me?

"Oi oi~ what are you doing?" I asked with irritation in my voice.

He sighed as he closed his eyes, I was just about to shout again but he pulled me back to my bed and hugged me quietly.

I think my face is burning. Thank God my face was near his chest, he wouldn't be able to see me.

"Don't leave me, Sho." He whispered so I looked up.

My face burned and blood rushed into my face again when I saw his face near mine so I looked down to his chest again and said, "B-Baka. I'm not going anywhere." I stuttered.

Well, why would I leave when all I need is already here?

This idiot.

But... Can I do it? Can prove Satsuki that I can take care of Natsuki? That I wouldn't hurt him? That I wouldn't leave him broken?

What if I can't do it?

What if... I hurt Natsuki?

Who knows but, maybe...

I'm already dying?

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(( A: Hi gays. I know this chap is short. I'll try to do longer chaps in the future when feels took over my body. Mehehe~

Thanks to the people who still read thiissss~ ~ ~

UNEDITED BTW, SO CRAPPY, i guess

anywayyy

I love you gays. And pls dunthink that me saying i love u is weird but its fine bc i am weird wait what anyway bye i am so crazy ))