But It Hurts

When I did see you

I saw you for the first time when I was sixteen . You didn't notice me until I was introduced to you by your father yet I had from the moment I had entered the hall . How could I not ? It was hard to not notice you, standing next to the pillar, holding a glass of scotch, looking bored ,as the people around you continued talking animatedly, trying to engage you in their conversation while you would nod slightly at whatever they did say . These parties required for people to have a facade in place , smile and socialise, despite one's own will . Yet their you stood, looking like you would trade it all to be able to leave . It was fascinating to say , at the least .

I saw you sigh as you realised your drink was over and excuse yourself to the bar ,not even bothering to smile as you walked off towards the bar in the far right of the hall . You continued to ward off the women flocking around you , stopping you on the way with polite greetings and flirtatious smiles .As one of the many beauties that stopped you in your strides to reach the bar walked off ,clearly bummed by your lack of response to her ,you rolled your eyes, quite prominently so and in that moment you seemed more childish than a 24-year-old man ought to have . I couldn't help but let out a small chuckle . If I did have to aptly describe you , in that moment I would have said you were ; alluring . For that's what you were, alluring , enticing , fascinating , magnetic. Even in your distaste of your surroundings, you seemed to pull people's gazes towards you like you had mine and you wouldn't let their attention go, like you hadn't mine .I continued to stared at you, my gaze never flickering .

You reached the bar and signalled to the bartender, as you helped yourself into the high chair .You crossed your long legs ,while you strummed your fingers on the table ,impatiently awaiting your drink . The frown etched on your face was marring your beauty . It didn't suit you . The line on your forehead was visible as your frown deepened for reasons best known to you . I could only conjure images of you smiling ,for in the half an hour that I had been here ,all you seemed to do was frown , sulk and look sullen . Surely you would have looked more beautiful if you had smiled . Odd it did sound even to my mindful musings ,yet referring you as anything as beautiful didn't seem justified . It did seem too feminine to describe the masculinity of your structure though. The broadness of your shoulders , the strength in your muscles as they stretched the expensive fabric of your suit , the length of your legs and your towering frame of well above six feet , could only be described as masculine , a man . What was I to describe you as , if not beautiful then ? Would handsome suffice and portray the beauty of your long lashes cocooning your eyes, piercing and striking even as I did notice you from a distance , the contoured cheekbones rising to their peak just below your eyes shaped as almonds , your aristocratic nose straight in its length and sharp in its wake leading to your full luscious lips oddly pink for a man yet not for you as your face rounded off with your chin jutting out just about slightly . Your impatience seemed to have got the best of you as you called out to the bartender again with your face set in a hard line as you drove your hand through your thick brown locks styled as suited for a man of your stature . When the bartender did bring your drink you jerked it out of his hands encircling the glass with your long fingers .

How was I to look away ,your expressions were fascinating as was your physical form enticing ? I couldn't do it . I couldn't look away.