Church Boys † Brendon Urie

23✝ One Last Kiss for the Far too Young to Die

"Dad!" He calls into the Church, as the door slams shut.

"Brendon!" I yell after him, watching his body become concealed by the thick smoke.

I choke on a sob as my legs give way and I land in a heap on the jagged pavement. I couldn't do anything but cry as I stretch my arms out pathetically, trying with all my might reach for him, to get him back, but as I was being dragged away, and no matter how much I wanted him to come running from the building and into my arms, he didn't. There was no magical, triumphant return due to a sudden change of heart like I'd hoped... and with that came the realization that I may never get him back.

I couldn't think straight anymore. My mind was preoccupied with too many things at once. Brendon, the Church collapsing, Brendon, the trouble I was in, if Brendon would make it out alive, what kind of repercussions I would have to face after all of this was over, and Brendon.

Dallon, who had previously been the one dragging me away, scooped me up into his arms and carried me across the street to a nice green lawn. The rest of the group trails behind, Dani with my phone in her hand, talking assertively to the woman on the other end.

"Yes, as I've said, there's one for sure, maybe two people still left in the church. No, we can't get him out, he just went to get someone else out. Well, isn't that the fire department's job? Just send someone, my god! I'm about to hang up. Not with that attitude I will not stay on the line! Okay, thank you."

Tears continue to escape my eyes as I'm sat gently onto the grass, Lindsay and Ab have a seat next to me as Dallon begins to pace back and forth, stopping occasionally to run his fingers through his hair aggressively, as if he's trying to calm himself down. It doesn't work. He continues moving aimlessly and I can only imagine the things that are going through his head. They're probably the exact same things that are going through mine.

Ab has her nails up to her lips and she's ripping the ends of them off one by one. Lindsay just sits with her head down.

Two black combat boots come into my line of vision as Dani sets my phone down on the plush grass at my feet. 

"The fire department is on their way," she informs us all impassively, with no hint of assurance in her voice. I find myself only able to nod, pulling my knees up toward my chest. I didn't blame her though, for her lack of emotion, there was nothing that any of us could do right now to cheer each other up. 

I knew talking wouldn't help much, but nonetheless, the first words that came to my mind left my lips.

"I can't believe this," I mutter, squeezing my eyes shut and feeling the last remaining tears fall down my cheeks.

"Me either," Ab replies, throwing herself back onto the grass with a huff.

"This whole night's just been crazy," I add quietly as my brain flashed random images of the night's entirety, trying to sort everything that had occurred. 

The way I'd felt when I found out that Brendon was even here to begin with, meeting Ab and Lindsay, the drugs the drinking, the Ouija board, Dallon scaring the life out of me, and me screaming at everyone in return. God, if I could only take back everything I'd said to Brendon tonight. All of it had been hurtful and malicious, and I couldn't live with myself if those were the last of things I'd gotten to say to him before...

"Yeah, well it wasn't supposed to turn out this way." Dani interrupts my thoughts, dropping herself down onto the grass beside us.

Something in me clicked as she'd said that, her words echoing inside my head, "It wasn't supposed to turn out this way."

Pent up anger served as a match to which Dani had just struck with her words.

"I'm sure it wasn't," I snap, "but it did." meeting her eyes, it was easy to tell that she was taken aback by my assertion. I turned my head then, to the other girls sitting around me who had winced at my statement, "And now, thanks to all of you guys-"

Dallon stopped pacing immediately, facing me with rage overtaking his features, "Don't you dare fucking blame this on us!" he yells, "We're all just as worried about Brendon surviving this as you are. You may think you're special in this case, but you're not. I've known him for eight years! You've known him less than a week! So don't you even try to play the blame game because I can throw it right back onto your shoulders!"

"Guys," Lindsay says firmly, jumping to her feet and standing between Dallon and I, "We've all been through enough tonight. Yes, we're all worried about Brendon, so right now that's all we need to be worried about, not ourselves."

Dallon and I stare at each other for a second longer, as he crosses his arms over his chest in a silent agreement. Never breaking eye contact, I rise to my feet and step toward him, wrapping my arms around him. The gesture catches him off guard for only a moment before he's wrapping his long arms around me as well.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't really mean that..." I say into his bony shoulder. He nods, squeezing me tightly for a mere second,

"I know, kid... don't sweat it." he replies, his voice a bit hoarse, "Brendon's gonna be alright."

"I hope so."

And with that, I feel Ab, Lindsay, and Dani wraps their arms around us as well, as the sound of fire truck engines grows closer in the distance.