Chapter 4: Realizing What I Can And Can't Do

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My back pressed against the table causing me to breathe sharp in panic as a breeze washed over my most private of areas. My heart was beating more then a millions miles in hour, fast enough to win a race if it had been a vehicle. I stared up at the ceiling as I tried my best not to look at the doctor as he prepared the instruments. My mind continued to wonder to Eric as I stared at the clock, this was the last place I wanted to be but I knew I needed to do this. Not only for the sake of myself but the sake of my family's reputation.This was the only way I knew of where I wouldn't have to tell them how I had let them down, the only way I could go back to at least pretending everything was fine. Another long minute stretched by as I finally looked at the vacuum like instrument the doctor was sterilizing and I held my breath waiting for the worse.

"Are you ready?" He asked smiling gently. I looked at him for a moment wondering if he was seriously asking me that, wondering what exactly it was he had to smile about.

"I'm not, isn't that why I'm here?" I asked, the hurt filling my voice before I could even manage to stop it. He nodded his head slowly with a saddened expression and lifted my hospital gown slowly as the instrument got closer. My wolf went numb inside of me, refusing to be with me as I aborted my unborn pup. Suddenly when he was only inches away and Eric's words came echoing into my mind.  

" You're just not what I want.."

"I rejected you so things like this wouldn't happen."

My eyes clenched tightly at the realization that not only was I letting him win, but I was killing the only thing in this world I can truly call mine. Suddenly I shot up and ran from the table grabbing my clothes as I rushed away from the doctor and into the bathrooms. I couldn't have this abortion, it wasn't right for me to do that no matter what Eric said, because in my heart... I knew it wasn't what I really wanted to do. I threw my clothes on and ran out of the clinic to my car, speeding the whole way home.

"Hey sweetheart, why don't you come sit for a minute, relax a bit." My dad smiled patting the couch as I walked in the door. I was almost surprised to see he wasn't in his study instead, after all it was what my mom called his private sanctuary. I checked my phone time before nodding, making sure I still had a good hour and a half before archery practice. "How was your day?"

"Fine, me and Cassidy had a pop quiz. I'm more than sure I made at least a 90." I smiled as my father nodded.

"You should be aiming for 100, don't ya think? A future Alpha should always be smart and multi-talented, those are good traits. Just like I told you with archery; As long as you aim right, you'll never miss your target." He grinned, I  sighed nodding at him just as my mother walked in shaking her head and wiping her hands on her apron.

"Leave the girl alone Adam, she tries hard. Archery, volleyball, soccer, and of course pack meetings. She hardly has anytime for herself and whenever she's home you're nagging her to try harder. She's only 16." My mother reminded him kissing his cheek and mine as she flowed through. My mother was beautiful and it was safe to say a very talented woman. Often daddy told me how lucky he was to have such a perfect mate, and he could only wish and hope I got as lucky.

"I just want her to do her best Avery, perform to the best of her abilities, and I know she can do even better then she is now. Maybe join student council, that be nice." He smiled as my mom's watch beeper went off.

"She is doing her best, keep pushing her and you'll break her! She should be enjoying her teenage years, but your ripping them from her. Now Addy, go ahead up and get ready for archery practice honey." My mom smiled before heading back into the kitchen. I ran upstairs changing into my archery gear and grabbing my bow and arrows before heading out the door.

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