This Is My Story.

Self Harm.

23/11/15

Self Harm isn't cared about enough.
Self harm doesn't necessarily mean cutting your skin to reveal a scar, no it could mean punching a wall out of anger, punching yourself out of frustration, pinching your skin out of anxiety, hitting your head to switch off the voices, allowing those voices to win, to let you do those things to yourself.
There are many forms of self harm, but people don't pay enough attention, in fact they refuse to, because they don't want to see what is right in front of them.
If they shut it out and pretend that it doesn't exist, in their eyes, that makes it okay.
But it's not okay, people do need to be well more aware of it, you need to see the signs, you need to open your eyes, because the people closest to you could be harming themselves and you can't even seen it, because they have gotten so well at hiding it.
They found the places where the scars won't be seen, or they make sure that it won't be a permanent scar, they can come up with an excuse if it's just a bruise, or maybe even a scratch, you wouldn't think nothing of it.
Because why should you?
That person when they are around you, are happy, they're full of smiles, full of laughter, and just complete and utter joy.
But when they're alone it's a different case.
See that person lived for being around you, because it shut of those thoughts, shut off those demons, allowed them to be momentarily free.
But once alone the voices are back, the snide comments, the chanting, the egging on, it's all back, and they can't make them go away.
It's easier to fake what is going on inside by plastering a smile onto your face.
You have to become someone who can see through the fake smiles.
Watch their eyes, do they crinkle like they used to? Is their laugh as full as it used to be? Are you truly talking to the same person you used to know.
There should be a lot more acknowledgment of self harm, because so many children are out there right now hurting themselves and parents don't even see, or they shut it out so they don't have to see.
They turn a blind eye to their child who is only a few steps away from attempting suicide, all because they don't want to deal with it.
And when that day comes, you find out your daughter or your son has ended their lives, they couldn't take the voices anymore, they couldn't take the pain, it's the only way they knew they could make it all stop, just make it go away.
So they took their own life, and you'll blame yourself, because a part of you knew that something was wrong, and you did nothing to help.
To the parents that know they're children are self harming and are not doing anything to help them, I hope you see sense, and I hope you help them in the best way that you can before it is too late.
To the parents that know nothing of it, and would never in a million years believe their child would do such a thing.
Don't be so quick to think that, talk to them, look out for a change in behaviour, look for new marks upon their skin.
Anyone can be succumbed by the voices, don't think your child or even yourself are any different to the people that already have.