charcoal and scars

chapter 25

I would just like to say Aradia and Jade have no interference with my decision. It is purely KK, and how damn cute he is being right now.

Right now is of course the Christmas party orchestrated by Jade and Aradia, much to KK's surprise. There's a Christmas tree in the corner of the living room by the TV, the kitchen table and the counter are laden with all sorts of holiday foods, and Nanda is wearing a red Santa hat.

Nanda's hair is a surprisingly bright fuchsia, and looks as newly died as KK's. I'm surprised that her eyes are a jade green rather than Karkat's red color; for some reason, I assumed that passed through families or something.

I sit a little apart from the group, watching them all go about making KK try some weird gray pudding, forcing the santa hat onto his head, and Jade unceasingly clinging to his arm. I'm not worried: I saw her flirting with the blonde hipster that stood up for KK a little while ago, and I think they're close to going out.

KK is smiling; a lot. I think he's surprised that people would care enough to do something like this, though judging from his past, that feeling is understandable.

I don't move from my seat at the bar even when Aradia calls me over for presents. Jesus, they went all out with this. I had noticed the numerous presents under the brand-new Christmas tree, one of them from me. KK loves the set of CD's I got him, and I'm glad for that, but I have a bit of a different present in mind. Too bad everyone else is here, because there's no way in hell I'm saying anything in front of them.

Yeah, okay, I'm nervous as fuck, and that's probably just an excuse.

Jade made KK another charm for that bracelet he almost lost at the park, and it looks kinda like a roman numeral two. Why she would give him that, I have no idea. Actually that looks kind of like a Gemini...

"Hey, Sollux, heads up." My train of thought is interrupted by the small package flying at me. I barely manage to catch it before it smacks me in the face, and shoot Jade a glare. "Well, go on." Jade had apparently made me a bracelet like KK's, only with black thread. Its only charm is a six and a nine turned sideways, and I tell myself to ask her about it later.

KK is laughing his head off at my surprised face, and I shoot him a glare for good measure as well. Normally, I wouldn't wear it but, hey, its Christmas, so I slip it around my wrist and accept KK's teasing as he joins me at the counter.

I've never seen KK so happy. I don't think his smile has left since he got home from his run, and discovered his house had been decorated with the contents of a Christmas store. He looks so damn adorable, I catch myself staring on several occasions, and look away before he notices.

Shit, if I don't say it soon, I'm going to chicken out.

KK, being oblivious as fuck, doesn't notice when I open my mouth several times to say it, but close it again before the words leave my lips. Damn, why was it so much easier to say it to FF?

Around nine o'clock, Aradia has to leave to visit some boyfriend I've never met, and Jade needs to get back to her own family, so Nanda gives her a lift home, leaving KK and I completely alone. What could possibly go wrong?

We sit in silence for a while and it's kinda nice, actually. He sits facing the counter, arms crossed on the tile surface, and I sit turned away from him, leaning back against said counter. In what should be a completely relaxing moment of quiet, I'm tense as fuck, and it's a miracle that KK doesn't notice. He's still smiling, chin now resting on his arms.

Suddenly, a hideous meow erupts from upstairs, and KK leaps to his feet.

"Shit, Gamzee's probably shut in the bathroom again!" I don't even realize I had moved until my hand latches around KK's arm as he's passing through the doorway out of the kitchen. Shit, nothing for it now.

"KK, wait."

He turns stops and turns around in surprise, and, shit, I'm blushing.

"Sollux?" I've been waiting for this opportunity all day, and now I can't get the fucking words out. "Is something wrong?"

"U-Um, not exactly." Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck...

"Well, obviously something is. Tell me what's-"

"I like you."

Shit. Yeah, I just confessed like that. Of all the cheesy ways to completely fuck up your relationship with your best friend, why don't you interrupt him while you're at it? He'll love that!

"W-What?"

"U-Um, yeah. Thhit, I didn't know how to thay that without freaking you out..." And I'm sure he's freaking out. Hell, he won't stop staring at me like I had sprouted horns and turned gray, and he should really close his mouth before some animal makes its nest in there.

He does eventually, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath before looking at me, trying to read if I'm playing him.

"No shit?" I clear my throat awkwardly.

"No thit."

"Oh, well, good then. 'Cause then this would just be really awkward." He looks away again, rubbing the back of his neck.

"What would be?" He laughs feebly.

"I like you too." Um, I'm not really sure what I was expecting. Rejection, probably; denial, maybe; a miracle like this? God no.

I let out the breath I realize I was holding, and start laughing with relief. Then I pull him into a hug, and he yelps in surprise.

"Thank Jethuth Chritht!" I laugh, my heartrate picking up when he returns the hug by hooking his hands around the crook of my elbows and burying his nose into my shoulder. Damn, could he get any cuter?

"What? Did you think I'd say no?" He mumbles, his voice coming out muffled through my shirt.

"Mm, maybe." After a minute, I release him but keep my hands hooked around his waist, and am quite unable to remove the grin from my face. KK's blushing like a fucking cherry, but he's smiling too. He looks up at the ceiling, a flicker of surprise passing his features.

"Mistletoe." He mutters, causing me to look up as well. When had Jade had the chance to put that up in the doorway?

I reconnect our gazes, and he's looking at me expectantly, with a stupid smirk on his face.

"What?" I inquire, both of us ignoring another meow from Gamzee.

"You better hurry up and kiss me before that mistletoe wilts, dumbass." And so I do, and maybe, just maybe, I might believe in heaven again.