Moving to America

Chapter 11

"We need to talk," Clara says as she walks into my room.

I groan, "first off I was sleeping and second I don't want to talk to you."

Clara perches at the end of my bed and waits for me to sit up, "how long have you had a problem with food?"

My stomach churns, "what do you mean?"

Clara speaks softly, "oh come on you ate melon and salad and that was it. You got antsy when I put honey in your oatmeal. You completely lost it when I asked you if you wanted cake."

I sighed, "I don't have a problem, just food and I aren't friends right now."

"And why is that?"

When I don't say anything she speaks again, "is it Rob?"

I inhale sharply biting my lip.

"I know you don't have to tell me but I want to help."

"Okay," I say, I need to trust someone here, I just don't know if Clara is the best decision. My palms become clammy, why am I doing this again? Heaven only knows.

"My Mum and Rob got together when I was thirteen. They were so happy. She was so happy. It was great for a bit, but Rob didn't like me. He wanted Mum, but not me. It started with him shouting at me, even if something wasn't my fault. 

"Once I remember Mum was still at work and I was sent home from school because I wasn't feeling well. Rob was the one to pick me up and take me home, when we got there he started shouting abuse at me, basically because he had a bad day and lost some money.

"He hit me and I fell over, he left a bruise on my jaw. When Mum came back I told her that I fell down the stairs. That year Mum thought I was a very accident prone child. I didn't want to ruin her happiness. When I was fourteen Rob was obsessed with my appearance, or rather lack of it.

"He didn't like the fact that I wasn't super skinny, he would punish me for everything I ate. Once I ate a chocolate cake at a friends birthday and when I came back he gave me a concussion and three broken ribs. 

"I stopped eating all together as every time I tried I saw his face, staring at me, urging me to eat it so I could 'fall down some stairs'. Sarah noticed and found the ten steps challenge. Each step you have to race you friend to finish whatever that round is. The one who loses the most rounds has to eat a chocolate bar.

"That's a lot of motivation. I think come on, eat the fruit, it's better than the chocolate. Every time I couldn't physically eat we did the ten steps, not always making it to the end. If I threw up we started again, so I'm getting better, to put it simply."

Clara sat for a second before launching herself at me holding me tightly in a hug. "I'll help you."

"Thanks," I sniffed, by this point tears were cascading down my face. I cursed myself, willing for the tears to stop. I willed myself to stop hurting. To heal.