Infiltration

Go Be Happy

4. Have I made my fucking choice yet? No. NO I HAVEN'T! Alex or Tyler. Tyler or Alex. I've been struggling with this question for over two freaking years. 2. 2 whole fucking years. I can't. I can't believe that I am still struggling with this decision. You'd think I'd have the answer by now. I keep going back to the whole pros and cons list. Like I think, hey Tyler's pretty great, but so is Alex. Tyler's this but Alex's that. Alex doesn't do this, but Tyler doesn't do that. It's an endless circle of me going back and forth in my head. Every time I think about it I just get more confused. Everyone seems to have their own opinion of who I should end up with but me. I have no clue. I love them both, how can I choose. This is what's so wrong about teenage love triangles that you see in the movie or read about in books. It's never truly a love triangle. I mean. The person in the middle doesn't truly love both of them so much that they can't figure out who they love more. It's very obvious who they are going to choose from the very beginning. Always. There's always an obvious favorite. It's pathetic, and not true. I've never seen a love triangle where the person is so hopelessly in love with both of them it's tearing he or she apart thinking of having to choose one. I want to be happy, but I want both of them to be happy and one of them isn't going to be happy no matter what my decision is. So who's heart do I break?

5. It's fucking hot out here and I'm dying. Slowly. I'm melting in a puddle like the freaking Wicked Witch of the West.

I tried again to really pay attention, but found my eyes drifting. I looked at everyone. All 25 of us. A lot of these girls I will not see again. They will be scattered across the world. Some going straight into the agency, many going into spy college. I looked at Tyler and he looked back at me. I had been avoiding him since the thing with his dad. I didn't know what to say to him. I didn't know what I would do if I was around him. I need to be away from him until I know for sure what I'm going to do. I looked at my friends. I looked at them and wondered where we were going to end up. What was going to happen to us now? None of us has really decided what we're going to do after this. Our plans have changed so many times I've lost count. We're probably going to end up split up and I don't know if I can handle that. They are my support system. My life line.

I don't want us to end like this. I don't want us to end and never talk again. I couldn't handle that. I couldn't.

I looked over at the parent section. So many powerful people sat in those chairs. So many agents, congressmen, CEOs, and our Vice President... I mean new President. That's going to take some getting used to. I looked at my parents. They looked so happy. My mom was over the moon, clinging onto my dad as if he was going to disappear again... and who knows... he might. I looked at Jade's parents. People I have always thought of as my second set of parents. They looked so proud. Then I looked over at Jess's dad and mom. Jess's dad had bags around his eyes. I guess the job of President was way more than he thought it would be. Or maybe he's still shaken up over the sudden death of his close friend. Dee's parents were sitting there looking like models. It was crazy how stunning they were. It was no wonder where Dee got her looks. Bri's parents looked much better than I thought they would after just today finding out that their daughter has been attending a school for spies for years and is having her graduation in the front yard of our school because our school got blown up by the leader of a secret spy organization. They looked like this was all normal. I know their head must be spinning. I know they aren't allowed to know everything that their daughter has done during her time here. I know that, they know that, but they look like they couldn't be more proud of her either way.

"Now, to introduce our valedictorian, Brianna Sky." Headmistress Morgan said as we applauded Bri on stage. Bri had a different robe than us. Hers was all gold. It was gorgeous and pure, just like her.

"Hello Girls... and guys." She said smiling at the 5 guys in our class. "I don't even know where to begin. It feels wrong for me to be up here, talking to you guys. I still feel like this shouldn't be over. We've been through so much throughout the years that I can't imagine not seeing you guys everyday. We've been on missions together. We've trained together. We've almost died, multiple times, together. We're willing to die for each other. While I was writing this speech I was thinking of what motivational things I could tell you. I pondered telling you guys how great you guys are going to be on the field, but after all the training we've gone through ya'll damn well better me." There was a chorus of laughs before she continued. "I also thought of reminiscing on the times we spent together, both good and bad, but that would take us way longer than the time I have allotted for this speech. Writing this I couldn't think of what to tell you guy that would show how truly grateful I am to have spent these past couple years with you guys. We are not just classmates, we're family. You guys mean more to me than anything. I know I wouldn't have become the person I am today without you guys pushing me to be better every day. So I'm gonna keep this speech short and leave you with a couple of things. 1. If you guys need anything, and I mean anything. A passport, an escape, a new identity, help hacking into something, anything. Call me. Come to me. Come to any of us. We have to be there for each other, because frankly who else can we trust out there? 2. Please stay safe out there. I don't know what I would do if I heard that anything happened to any of you guys. And lastly, I love you guys. Thank you all for being the siblings I've always wanted. Thank you for being there in my time of need. Thank you for helping me deactivate a bomb and climb 30 foot rock walls and pass every level of cov' ops. This isn't good bye... it can't be. It's just a long see you later." She finished as tears slipped down her face. She walked off stage and retook her seat. Headmistress Morgan came back on stage smiling.