dear me [a journal of feelings]

[five]

[may 22, 2013]

i was thinking about this yesterday and something occured to me.

my friends are up in mountains and i'm drowning in lakes.

they're making cheer teams i didn't even know existed and i'm sitting here failing my math class - the class i should probably have an A in but i can't be bothered.

All i really know is that i hate math because i don't think there is a solution to every problem.

i can't believe it.

there isn't a solution to the lonliness that creeps up my bones and squeezes my throat with an elegence that frightens and enchants me. 

it won't leave me alone.

i want more of it.