alexis
I lead Calum to my bedroom, my heart racing at an incredible fast pace the whole time. I can't help but think of what happened the last time we were in a bedroom.
What Calum did to me should have obliterated every ounce of trust I had in him, but despite the past events between us, I still trust him, at least a little bit. Enough to let him into my house, where my grandmother sleeps down the hall. I shouldn't trust him, and this I know. But all of the times he'd shown his love for me far outweigh the bad, and so I let him into my room.
It hurts me to see him this way, really. The circles below his eyes are deep and dark, sinking into his skull. His smile lines have disappear into his face. He must not smile much anymore. His posture is slouched and tired, and his eyes are hollow and glassy. I wonder what the past months have held for him. Perhaps he was in just as much pain as me, despite behind the cause of it.
I let that thought stay in my mind for a moment. What if he's been suffering just the way I have? I wish I could say he deserves it, but I don't believe that for a second. I don't believe people are the worst things they've done, or the best things they've said. They have to be somewhere in between, or else life would be only ups and downs, with only a grey area in between.
Despite his actions, I think he deserved the world.
But the word is a horrible, toxic place, as I've come to learn.
I walk into my bedroom and stiffly sit down on the small loveseat in the corner, facing my desk chair where I assume Calum was going to sit.
He however, continued to stand in the doorway, peering awkwardly inside my room as if he doesn't think he is welcome.
"I like your room," he notes. I offer a small smile at the him. I never thought he'd see this room.
"Thanks. "You can come in, if you want. You don't have to stay in the doorway." I add after a moments thought. He just stares at me with his exhausted eyes, not daring to blink. I don't think either of us want to close our eyes for even a second. Neither of us wants to miss the importance, the significance of this night.
"You still trust me, after all of this?" He asks, and I answer quietly.
"I'll always trust you, Cal." The nickname slips too easily from my lips, and I watch as he recoils at the word. I don't think he ever thought he'd hear it come from my mouth again.
this is short and I'm sorry but I wanted to update for you
i just bought my slfl tickets!! I have VIP for sep 2!!!!!!!
are you going to sounds live feels live and if so when?
we hit 3k reads last night and that is insane. thank you so fucking much. It means so much time.
thank you so much for reading
BINABASA MO ANG
and then you left // cth
Fanfiction"you left me, cal. after everything you'd said, after every promise, you left me without even saying goodbye," my words knock the wind out of him. he doesn't know what to say, what to do. but even so, he stares into my eyes, reminding me of everythi...
