This is it... Castiel thought as he stared out over the edge of the roof. This is where I say goodbye...
He never wanted it to go this far. He never wanted to want to kill himself again, to crave death.
The sad thing was, he didn't cry. Most people in this predicament would be in tears at this point, but no, not Castiel. He locked his pain inside.
He had always dreamt of the end, to start all over again. Castiel let all happy memories slip away, all except the memories of Dean, though he didn't know why.
He had tried to end it before, but people had always found him just in time before he bled out. If he did it this way, if he jumped off the roof of his college building no one would be able to save him.
His lifeless corpse would be scraped up by morning and no one would miss him.. Well okay, maybe that was a lie. Gabriel would miss him, and so would Charlie... He hated the thought of hurting them, but he didn't see any other options.
He took a deep breath and shut his eyes, lifting up one of his legs to take the first step.
"Cas! What the hell?! Don't you fucking jump!"
Castiel put his foot down and turned to face Dean, eyebrows furrowed.
Dean looked panicked and somewhat out of breath as if he had been running. "Why are you doing this?" He asked, stepping closer.
Cas shook his head and rubbed at his eyes in order to stop the tears that were threatening to fall at the sight of his roommate. He couldn't cry now. "Why do you care? You hate me anyways. With me gone you can get a roommate that you actually like, someone who isn't stupid like me." He pointed out, hugging himself.
With a small frown on his face Dean moved closer again. "So what if I hate you? That doesn't mean I'm heartless! Is that why you want to kill yourself? Because I hate you, which, by the way, I don't! I'm just returning your attitude."
He rolled his eyes. "Yeah right! I can tell when someone hates me Dean, now why don't you do us both the favour and let me jump." Cas' gaze softened a little as he turned back around to look over the edge.
Dean sighed and moved so he was right behind Cas. "I don't hate you..." His voice was soft, truthful. He stood next to Cas suddenly, right on the edge with him.
"What're you doing?" Cas asked, slight panic in his voice. He looked at Dean incredulously.
"If you jump, I'm jumping with you. You're not taking that step alone."
"No, go back inside."
"Cas, I'm not leaving you alone when you're about to jump."
"Stop calling me Cas, my name is Castiel!."
"You really want to get into that argument right now?"
"Whatever."
Dean clenched his jaw and pulled Cas back from the edge. "Look at me. Fucking look at me, right now!" He demanded, forcefully tipping Cas' face up to look him in the eyes.
Cas tried to pull away, but soon gave up when he realised that he wasn't strong enough.
Dean relaxed his grip on the others arms. "I understand that you're upset, but this isn't the answer. I don't hate you, I've never hated you. In fact, it's the exact opposite, I like you- a lot. Cas, I- look.. I've never been good with words, but seriously, whatever it is that makes you feel like you should do this isn't important and maybe you should just talk about it instead of keeping your pain and anger locked up, it's only gonna hurt you more and you'll just end up on the edge again..." He sighed quietly, pulling Cas into a hug.
