Hide It (Spamano)

Hide It

In another life he was my foster brother. I used to live at his place but for a while now I've been living with my annoying little brother. I always did like him, even though I'd never tell him that, only now something has changed. My heart races when I see him and my face feels hot. I'm finding myself wanting to touch him, to kiss him. But how could I ever tell him that. I'm just a kid compared to him. He could never like me the way I like him.

He comes to visit from time to time and I can't wait for it, but being around him makes me so nervous I wish he would leave. With Feliciano there I can usually stay far enough away that I don't feel too uncomfortable but I'm going to be all alone for this visit and I'm scared I'll embarrass myself.

"Lovino!" he greeted, picking me up off the floor after I'd opened the door.

"Put me down, you jerk!" I yelled, popping him on the top of the head.

"Okay, okay." He set me down, rubbing his sore head.

It was all I could do to hide my feelings. The only way I could look aside from lovesick was angry.

"I'd made dinner. It's sitting in the kitchen," I informed him walking away. I just wanted an excuse to put some space between us.

"You made dinner? How nice of you," he praised, joining me in the kitchen.

"What else was I supposed to do? Feliciano isn't here and I need to eat."

"Well, don't tell Feliciano, but I've always preferred your cooking, Lovi."

"Just get the plates and set the table," I barked, turning to hide the blush spreading across my cheeks.

I spent most of dinner focused on my plate. It was hard to sit across from him without staring at him. He had such a sweet face though, always smiling. His voice was kind and melodic too. I could listen to it every day without growing tired of it.

"Gil is pretty much full of it but I guess I can't really complain."

I blinked, having been stirred from my thoughts. It seemed he'd been talking this whole time but I'd been so distracted that I hadn't even noticed.

"You're pretty much full of it, Antonio," I covered quickly.

"That's not nice."

"Whatever." I got up from the table with my plate. "There is gelato in the freezer if you want it."

"I would love some! Would you like some help?"

"No, I got it. Just stay there."

Once in the kitchen, I breathed a sigh of relief. So far things had been alright. I just hoped they would continue that way for the rest of the night.

"I told you to wait in the dining room!" I grumbled carrying our gelato into the living room.

"I thought we could have it in here so we could listen to the music that I brought," Antonio explained, starting the switching on the vintage record player.

"You're such a bonehead, Antonio," I complained, setting down the gelato.

"You always liked the music at my place."

"Yeah but-." Antonio grabbed my hand.

"Do you remember when I taught you to dance?"

"Uh." He took my waist and spun me around the floor.

"You would dance and I would play this music on my guitar."

I stared in terror and tried to pull away. "Just let me go, you jerk! You know I've always been embarrass by my dancing."

There was no way I could be this close to him and not show my feelings. If he saw them then he would think I was weird and I would lose him altogether.

"Oh, come on, it's only the two of us. Why would you be embarrassed?" He held on firmly.

"No... I don't-." I grew stiff as he pulled me back in.

Truth was I wanted to be in his arms but when he looked down at me with that smile that made my heart skip a beat I was overcome with panic.

"I can't stand it when you touch me!"

I bolted and ran out of the room. Slamming my door shut, I sank to the floor. Now, I had done it. I just couldn't be normal for one night. Tears dribbled down my chin as I wished my feelings away.

"Lovino?" Antonio called through the door, none of his usual cheer audible, "I'm sorry that I annoyed you. I only wanted to spend some time together, just the two of us, but if I bother you that much then I'll just go."

His voice faded as he walked away and I jumped to my feet.

"No!" I cried, running after him. "Don't go!"

"Lovino?"

He stopped and I grab him by the shirt.

"Please, don't go!" I begged.

"Lovi?"

"You don't bother me! It's not that I don't want you to touch me! I just can't pretend that I don't love you if you do!"

"What?"

"I'll try not to let it get in the way! Just please don't go!" I cried.

"Oh, Lovino," he sighed, framing my face in his hands, "I love you too. I've loved you for so long. I just didn't want ruin what we had."

Tears of joy started to form in my eyes and I rushed forward to give him the kiss that I'd waited so long to give him.