Fairy Tail: Icy Sadness

Chapter two

  Everyone acted normally. They laughed and talked about whatever. They complained and argued over little, insignificant things. They were all the same-as they had always been and as each other. I wasn't.
  I was so different from all of them. They didn't really know me. Who I truly was and who they thought I was were two separate beings. I was different from who I used to be. The boisterous, feisty, ice stripper that I was only months ago has been lost to the cold, quiet, loneliness that I am now.
  By now I should be used to this feeling, but I don't think I ever will be. It's hard to see my friends because it reminds me of how I've changed, it reminds me of who I am and who I pretend to be. The happy carefree Gray has been gone for years-although the scars never appeared until a few months ago-but I'm the only one who knows. With a smile and a few laughs here and there everyone is fooled; even those closest to me can't see through my mask.
  Being with them all is exhausting. Carrying a conversation and making sure I act like the old me is such a delicate thing. One false move, and I'll be done for. They'll all see through me. Sometimes I think that's what I want. I want them to see my pain. I want help. I just need someone to know I'm hurting, and that might be all I need.
  Then I realize that letting people know is painful for everyone. If even one person finds out, soon everyone in the guild will know. I can't have people deal with my pain, it's mine and mine only.
  Then they'd want me to "get better" which is a fate worse than death. Some would say,"Please, don't cut anymore Gray," "When you hurt yourself, it hurts me," and then there would be the people who say "just get over it," "be a man," "you're pathetic."
  I can't just thrust my problems on others. That's selfish. They're my problems so I have to deal with them, not other people.
  After a while of dealing with everyone, I decided to leave. I didn't have any jobs and there wasn't a reason for me to stay.
  When I got home, I went to my room and sat in the bed. I got another hidden blade out of my dresser. I rolled up my sleeve and made one deep slice. I let the blood flow over my arm. I grabbed some tissues and pressed them against my fresh wound. I waited for the blood to let up and took the tissues off my arm and looked over the fresh cut. There was something so perfect about the pin straight line. The deep crimson color it had.
  The blood had mostly stopped flowing, but I subconsciously slashed the blade into my skin. Before I even knew what I was doing I had made three more lines identical to the first.
  "Erza wants to-," I heard a certain blonde begin, and then her breath caught. When did she get in here? I was probably too lost in thought to hear her come in.
  I didn't look up at Lucy, and out of the corner of my eye, I could tell she wasn't moving. I tried to think of a way to get out of this mess. I had been so careful up until now. What did I do wrong?
  "Come with me," she said sternly. I looked over at her and hesitated in following. She left the room and went across the hall to the bathroom. I was stuck in place for what felt like a fair amount of time then I figured I should follow her.
  When I finally made my body move to where Lucy had gone, she had found my first aid kit and laid out what she needed to clean and bandage my arm with. I walked over to her and reluctantly held my arm to her. She patched me up silently, and was extremely gentle.
  When she was done, she shut the first aid kit and placed it back under the sink where I kept it. I had been watching her, but she wasn't looking at me. When she looked up, I wasn't quick enough to avert my eyes.
  Her gaze was filled so many emotions-sadness, concern, fear.
  She brought her hand up to our faces and in her grasp was the blade I had hidden in the first aid kit.
  "You can't do this any longer. I know you have more," she pocketed the blade and held her hand out to me. I grabbed the blade out of my pocket where I had stashed it upon her arrival. "You can't keep hiding this. You need help." She said with gentle firmness. 

A/N
I'm really excited for the next chapter ^-^