#SUNSET!!!!

chapter 6.

Xoxoxo...

By age nine...i realised that I wasnt like every other girl. No girl wanted to be my friend..I had no sissies to hang with...why? I will tell you.

I was ugly.

Well...not monstrously ugly ....was just that...Every other girl was just beautiful..and I had the worst looks and baby fat....and had a little stutter. Which magically stopped a year later.

Two years earlier...I had braces on. Yes I went on a rampage with my brothers..and fell face Down..I cried for hours...I had to use the dreadful braces.

You could imagine the segregation. I tried everything to be in their tea plays...doll house parties...but I never got an invite...they gave an excuse I would scare the other kids..can you imagine? ...Eventually by age eleven I stopped caring and embraced my isolation. Happy moments was only when I was at home in that little kitchen ...with mother hen and her four ducklings.

My sweet brothers took me under their wings instead...I later realized that I preferred hanging with them more and their friends. I then developed the tomboyish characteristics. By age twelve the other guys thought I was cool. I wasn't scared of heights...or squirrels. ..or going hunting with them...and I didnt care about my looks.

A first ma tried to pull me back to being a girl...to play dress up with petticoats...have hair days....or learn how to walk and sit like a lady...I didnt have love for that. I would trade my dresses for pants, boots, and a check shirt...all tucked in...I found grandpa's cowboy ' s hat...and that completed my dressing.

I traded my dolls and doll houses, tea cups Ecetera for catapults, water guns, and play swords...and always looked forward to the boys time. She tried stopping me but eventually gave up...only of I promise to come back home unscathed. Which was usually the case...

I would go diving with the boys and dance under the rain...always shirtless. These made the boys like me more...The other girls wouldn't dare but I would. These made ma usually rushing out to pull me in by the ears...and scold me.

"Don't you know you are a girl lizzy?...she would ask scolding me.
"Well ....I look like a boy and act like one...maybe i am one"... I would retort back and rush up to my room ...when I finally hear her footsteps recinding back I would climb out through my window and go back out to play.

When they played war games...everyone wanted me to be their sidekick..I was a mean side kick...I even played capt. Sparrow and Peter pan. ..I loved my one eyed- patch. ..and fake beard and capt. Hook character...I felt powerful. With them I could be myself...my brothers took me everywhere..never left me out.

I loved the farm..The trees..The animals and wide fruits..I loved the sounds of guns shooting down a bird from the sky. .or the chopping down of a tree with an axe...The sound of sawing a wood...and the cluck cluck of an hammer making its rounds on a nail. I loved the horses...I even had a pony named chuck. Pa got it for my fourteenth birthday. I already had a dog named buck...I was the luckiest girl...I bathed them myself.

I learned the horse race by age fifteen ...I was on fire...they betted on me because I was the only girl who had the guts to participate. ...and because i was the only girl. .I got more cheers from the crowd. ..I didnt win the first time...but on the second and third...and fourth. .then no one wanted to compete with me.

When all the other girls were all prettied up...makeup and hair done...had ball dresses...all out in the town's social gathering hall...ready to come out on their debut...to dance with an equally dressed up boys..in sunday suits and smooth hairs while their parents watched...

I was on the other side of town..practicing my gun skills...on a deer...or a rabit. ..all dressed in my cowbow's boot and hat...skinny jeans and a check shirt tucked in....eyes on my target.