If Only (GxG)

Chapter 12 Navigation

We eat and chat as a group, but my thoughts keep drifting back: I'm not interested in anything romantic with Thomas. At one point, I realize I'm unconsciously shifting away from him, leaving a tiny gap between us on the bench. I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I also can't let him think anything might rekindle from last summer.

Later that afternoon, after a full day of classes, I head home, still rattled by the subtleties of Thomas's too-familiar closeness. I figure it's better to address it now rather than let it gnaw at me, so once I've thrown my backpack on the couch, I collapse onto my bed and compose a text to him:

Alison:
Hey Thomas—sorry I didn't mention this earlier, but I'm kind of talking to someone. Just want to make sure we're 100% clear we're going to the dance as friends, okay?

My phone buzzes only moments later:

Thomas:
Hey! Guess I wasn't as subtle as I thought today. I completely get it. I'll see you soon, and I'm still looking forward to the dance. Thanks for telling me, Alison—you're a good friend.

I let out a relieved breath; the tension in my shoulders eases. That's one less thing weighing on me.

Now, the more pressing matter: I want to ask Blake out on a real date.

London's huge, filled with possibilities. We can go somewhere discreet, well away from school, so there's little chance of running into anyone we know.

But the idea still leaves me with knots of nervous excitement—where could I take her that wouldn't break my budget? Would she even care about that?

A faint smile tugs at my lips as I consider how Blake has shown no particular interest in fancy places or pretenses. If anything, she's more comfortable in her own world, old money background or not. Something simple—like a cozy café in a quiet part of the city—might be perfect.

I close my eyes, imagining it: the two of us seated in a corner booth, talking for hours, her eyes lighting up when she laughs. The private corners of my mind conjure up the sound of her voice, her gentle touch. My cheeks burn just picturing it.

With a contented sigh, I reach for my phone again—this time to send a different sort of text.

Alison:
Good night, Blake. Hope you had a good evening... I'm still smiling from the weekend. Sweet dreams.

I watch the message send, thumping. Even though it's late, part of me hopes for a quick reply. Almost instantly, there's a soft chime.

Blake:
Good night, Alison. I can't stop smiling either. Sleep well, my darling.

I feel a surge of warmth, hugging my pillow as if I could cling to the emotions swirling inside me. The rest of the world drifts away, my thoughts full of her. As I drift toward sleep, it's with the certain knowledge that—whatever obstacles lie ahead—right now, I've never felt so alive.

『 °*• ❀ •*°』

Ross and I sprawl out in two battered chairs in the school's common area, killing time during our last free period. He's scrolling through his phone while I bury my nose in a biology handout.

I'm only half-focused when Ross suddenly whistles, low and ominous.

"What is it?" I mumble, blinking away the figures and charts in front of me.