Beloved

Janus

2018
Ryan Matson

The air was thick in the crowded classroom. Desks were pushed against each other to accommodate the forty students. All the Windows were pushed open but it still didn't help ease the stifling heat inside. The class was painted aqua blue, but it still didn't ease the uncomfortable students. The substitute teacher was crawling words of the board but he wasn't paying intention.

How could he when he was being suffocated from the over-crowded classroom. He had been afraid in close since he accidentally locked himself in their rusty old cellar at the age of nine. Even though, the windows and door was open, letting in fresh air, it didn't ease his mind knowing that two sections had been mashed together and forced to fill a small room. His mind was already set and how much he tried to deny that the walls weren't closing in, the different noises of students talking, whispering was making him claustrophobic.

His eyes were trained outside, his breaths ragged that his desk mate was starting to look panicked even though Ryan had told minutes ago that he didn't need to go tell the substitute about his problem. His forehead was sweaty and hot but he hadn't shrugged his jacket off him. He didn't need attention from anyone. He didn't need more eyes on him, more laughter filling his ears, teasing him in the corridors. Yapping on and on that his mother was crazy while his dad a alcoholic. Spreading rumours upon rumours, spreading the thick lie all over the school. He didn't need a coddling by the nurse to make it worse for him.

He remembered what his doctor had told him. He kept on staring at the sky, hammering the same sentence in his brain but it wasn't helping his uncomfortableness. Ten more minutes, its going to end. Ten more minutes and it'll end. His breathing was still uneven, when he answered the terrified desk partner, his eyes not leaving the same spot he had been drilling with his eyes for the longest time. He didn't even know how much time had past except that the class would end in ten more minutes and he could leave the stifling classroom.

The blue blurred, the substitute's chirpy suddenly drowning to a low murmur. His hand drilling, his monstrous doddle half finished. And he collapsed, a banshee scream filling his ears, leaving them ringing. And his eyes turned dark.

He woke up coughing, on his hands and knees. The ground was moist, a thin layer of dirty murky water around him. He hand instantly went to his mouth, staining it with red as he hacked more and more, his throat burning. Silence broke away like glass, as he coughed, his eyes not leaving the muddy water.

He hardly cared that his clothes were getting dirty or where he was. He was still finding hard to breath, his bloody coughs staining the water with scarlet. A echoing cry rose above him, accompanied by a rustic sound of metal creaking. And something still felt wrong.

His coughing fit finally subsided, leaving him reeling away the blood in horror. As his frantic eyes looked around for something familiar, he noticed his alien surroundings and the lone figure moving towards him slowly. Murky Forrest green trees rose few metres away from him, their canopy shading the unusual violet slits staring at him with a predatory look. The watery ground on which he was standing on was levelled and hard like concrete, the mossy water turning clear blue as it touched the brink of the lake which shone silvery grey like steel in the blue light. The sky was another matter entirely, light purple and blue on the horizon where a rust colored globe vanished under the silver of the lake.

The limping man was hearing distance now, his maroon suit contrasting against the unearthly glow of his horrendous face. Half of his face was beautiful, caramel skin with golden iris lined with gold glitter. The other half was pale, milky white, gagged with scars, his translucent skin pulled tight over his sharp features. His painted red mouth was smirking, his mouth tightening around the pale half. He was terrifying, a nightmare from dreams but.....at the same time beautiful as serpents are beautiful. Deadly and sure.

He reminded Ryan of yin and yang, white and black, not because of those two different skin tones but because the beautiful side of his face had an amused curve, happy and innocent while the other was dark and twisted. Two different sides.

He probably was lucid dreaming, while he was probably in the nurse's office eating for the rumours to reach him. Nothing here looked normal but it felt real. But he didn't get to dwell on touch as the strange man had started to speak, his voice velvety and soft. " Ryan Matson, I have a message of you".

His eyebrows scrunched up in confusion. He didn't directly look at the man, his features too uncomfortable for him. "What?"

"Who do you think I am?" The man asked, a grin spreading across his face, distorting his features into a cruel yet jolly grin. Instead of answering, Ryan glanced at the two places, one mossy jungle, the other steely. One pale, shining white in places the other colorful. One cold, the sweet and sickly. His face also depicted the concept like yin and yang.

He was instantly reminded of something his mother had told them last night, she was a mythology professor in the community collage. Something with two paths and two doors...

"Janus?" He asked, hoping he was right. The small smile answered his question, making his eyes widen in surprise. What the Fuck was happening? He can't really see Jan us, can he? That would be too weird.

"Yes, its real. I'm real. If I wasn't, neither would you"

"What?"

A cruel smile played on his lips as he crouched down, his pale veiny hands on his knees, to look him straight in his eyes. He stumbled back, managing not to fall at the Janus's proximity. "He sends a warning, Ryan. A terrible darkness is growing in the underworld, and you need to be careful of it before it engulfs you"

"But what's the message? And who sends it?" He felt more confused then ever. Even though nothing was making sense right now, he felt somewhat at peace. Like his heart believed what the male was saying.

"He says he has the answer to your question. 'The ground of your birth is soaked with it and that what they seek'".

"Riddle? He left a me riddle?"

"Yes. And I stand for opposites. Sad and happy. Cruel and kind. Ugly and beautiful. Dead and Alive. That's my answer to you".

"The message came from the dead...". He whispered to himself, his eyes on the grey waters, his heart best rising gradually. Blood pumping in his body in an erratic movement.

His heart wasn't beating..