MELTING A FROZEN HEART

Chapter 39

But, it changed after I knew about her.

Her heartfelt smile, however short or small it was, looked incomparably beautiful and precious.

Subconsciously, I longed to see her smile as often as possible.

I didn't realize when things started to change between us. 

Waiting for each other on the terrace every night, noticing the smallest changes in her expressions, reading the intent in her eyes despite the blankness in them, teasing her to evoke a reaction, playfully inciting her, liking her chastising me for missing dinner, enjoying her concern and affection towards my siblings, feeling comfortable enough to share my deepest thoughts honestly, confident that she wouldn't judge me for my true identity, feeling proud at her strength, wanting to be stay by her at her low, willing to tell her how serene her amber eyes look until she believes it, arguing and fighting with her knowing she's as adamant and stubborn as me and wouldn't get scared at my change in tone, cherishing that one argument where she fought with me to defend me, every minute incident in her presence has become an unforgettable memory.

When has all this started?

When? Where? How?

I don't know.

The one thing I know certainly is that I want it to stay this way further ahead too.

In all my life, I had never once felt I was missing something. I had my siblings, my cousins, my subordinates and business. I wasn't in need of anything more.

But, when Raelynn stepped in, I strangely felt complete.

I had never felt anything was missing, but even then, I feel she somehow completed me in her own way.

It was maybe for that reason that I felt a huge void in me, in my house and in my daily life when she walked away.

It was then that I started speculating my own emotions, my own unease, and I have realized something very important.

I have always felt at peace in her presence. Peaceful and .... happy.

She has brought forth a part of my childhood self that has been long buried somewhere deep inside.

I had once been carefree, mischievous, playful, excited and competing. It was a part of me that only my parents, the other elders and Aurelio had seen.

Somewhere along the line, while trying to be a flawless and responsible guardian to my siblings, a perfect son to my father and a strong leader in the organization, I have lost that part of me.

But, around her, walls just vanish without notice and apprehensions melt away.

I don't want to lose that part of me again.

It's because of that when I got to know that Ren misunderstood about me deciding to marry someone else, I felt an abrupt hitch in my chest.

An anxiety of losing something very precious struck me and I couldn't waste a moment to rectify the situation and hold onto those emotions.

When I reached her to explain everything, my instincts pushed me to earn her forgiveness at any cost.

I want her beside me always.

And for that to happen, I need to apologize however many times as it takes.

At that moment, I knew every fiber in me wanted Raelynn in my life, for as long as I live.

That instant, my pride lost its futile battle against the overwhelming emotions in my heart and I stepped back to kneel before her, something that I've never done before for anyone in my life.