Sunny X Basil: You Make Everything Okay

CHAPTER 25

Fun fact: Basil's bed is the only bed besides Sunny's own bed that he considers is a comfortable bed. So...( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

SUNNY POV

School is a nightmare. The only person that could help me was Basil.
I can't believe he'd pull a knife on them. God, I love him so much.
The doctor said I have to not go to school for a few days. I just hope Basil will be alright with the bullies.
My phone rings.
"Hello? This is Sunny."
"Oh, uh...is Basil home?" An unfamiliar voice comes from the speaker.
"N-no...do you want me to tell him something?" I ask.
"No, that's okay. Just call me when he's back, okay?" The phone fizzles out.
That was...odd.

But at least now I have time to sort these photos out.
Sunny -> Aubrey

Sunny: hey
Sunny: ...can I forward your text message with kim
Sunny: ill take that as a yes
Aubrey: IF YOU FUCKING DARE
Aubrey: wheres my copypasta
Aubrey: (insert the copypasta here writer dumass)
Aubrey: oh here it is ahem SHUT UP BITCH ASS MOTHER FUCKER I SWEAR TO GOD ILL SEND A RACOON UP YOU SIX FEET EXCEPT YOU'RE NOT EVEN SIX FEET SO THE RACOON WILL BLOW YOUR NONEXISTENT BRAIN CELLS EAT THE REMAINS THEN BURN THE BODY TURN IT INTO MY ASHTRAY THEN THROW IT OFF THE NONEXISTENT TWIN TOWERS UNTIL THEY SHATTER INTO PIECES PUT THE REMAINS IN A GLASS BOTTLE THEN SEND IT STRAIGHT TO HELL WHERE IT CAN COOK FOR SEVEN YEARS AFTER COOKING FOR SEVEN YEARS ILL SEND IT TO EBAY WHERE IT'LL BE AUCTIONED FOR SEVENTY CENTS BECAUSE NO ONE WANTED YOUR DEAD BODY BECAUSE THEY SUCK ASS BUT ONE OF THEM BOUGHT IT BECAUSE THEY WANTED TO TORTURE IT BY GRABBING THE COOKED REMAINS AND THROW IT INSIDE AN M-54 GRENADE WHERE IT'LL KILL SEVEN SOLDIERS BECAUSE YOUR REMAINS ARE SO UGLY THAT WHEN THEY ASKED THE MIRROR WHO WAS THE PRETTIEST OF THEM ALL THEY SAID NOT WHO YOU'RE LOOKING AT AND THE SEVEN SOLDIERS WERE BURIED AND THEIR GHOSTS WILL HAUNT YOUR REMAINS AND THEN FIND YOUR SOUL AND GET THE GRIM REAPER TO TAKE THE GHOST OUT OF YOUR GHOST OUR OF YOUR GHOST LIKE THE FUCKING MATROSHKA RUSSIAN DOLLS THEN THEY'LL THROW YOU OUT THE AIRPLANE AND GIVE YOU A PARACHUTE ONLY THE PARACHUTE ISNT A PARACHUT ITS ACTUALLY A BACKPACK WITH A BOWLING BALL THAT WILL GIVE YOU BRAIN DAMAGE WITCH ISNT EVEN POSSIBLE BECUASE YOU DONT HAVE A BRAIN SO HOW WOULD YOU GET BRAIN DAMAGE THEN YOUR SKULL WILL GET SPLIT INTO SEVEN DIFFERENT PIECES EVEN WHEN YOU'RE A GHOST THEN I'LL MAKE YOU CHUG GROUND UP CHERRY PITS AND DRAINO UNTIL YOUR LIVER SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTS AND THEN ILL STEAL YOUR DICK AND GIVE IT TO BASIL SO YOU WONT BE ABLE TO REPRODUCE ANY MORE FUCKN MENACES TO SOCIETY THEN GO ONTO THE I-90 AND THROW YOU OFF THE BRIDGE WHILE THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS CAMERAS WATCH AND FACEPALM AND THEN HAVE YOU FREEZE IN THE LAKE EVEN WHEN IT'S IN THE SUMMER BECAUSE OF MASS CLIMATE CHANGE TAKE YOU OUT GET A BUTCHERS CLEAVER SEVER YOUR LIMBS EVEN WHEN YOU'RE A GHOST GET TOBY SHAWN KENOBI TO GO ITS OVER KANAPIN I HAVE THE HIGHER ALTITUDE I ADVISE YOU TO NOT ATTACK ME AS YOU HAVE A GREAT DISADVANTAGE THEN DROWN YOU IN LAVA OBLITERATE YOUR VITAL ORGANS OUT WITH A LASER BEAM THEN GET BASIL WHO'S STILL NUTTING YOUR BALLS TO GIVE YOU ANAL SO HARD YOU FINALLY LEAVE THIS PLANE OF REALITY THEN I'LL REALITY SHIFT LIKE ALL THOSE TIKTOKERS AND REPEAT THE SAME THING

Sunny: ok thats cool ig and i feel like basil wouldnt do that bcos i give him anal other way around dumass /j
Aubrey: what do you want bitch
Sunny: why are you skipping school
Aubrey: no u
Sunny: i lost half of my weight through blood
Aubrey: oh cool i was just inside drinking wanna come over
Sunny: i just wanted my photos
Aubrey: drink with me then
Sunny: if you make me drink im gonna stab you again
Aubrey: just one sip i do it all the time
Sunny: basil would kill me why not just ask kim
Aubrey: cuz shed want to give it to everybody and shit idk im not a rocket doctor look JUST GET OVER HERE DUMBASS
Sunny: Fine

I'm not getting drunk.
(SPOILERS: he got drunk)

Aubrey's house has seen better days.

"Sunny! Come on, what do you want?"
"A water." I sit in the chair next to the table. Alcohol bottles surround me.
"You want me to spike that water, or...?"
"Look, Basil would kill me, okay-" Aubrey shoves a drink down my throat. I accidentally swallow about two ounces of the stuff and cough out the rest of it.
"What...the fuck wrong with you?" I sputter. The taste is indescribable...I like grape soda better.
"Hey, you didn't want to drink it so I made you." she chugs it like a fucking frat boy.

"Where do you even get this shit?"
"Mom never locks the liquor cabinet, and she always buys new ones. Now, drink yours before I force you to again. Think of it as...as a bullet. At first you hate it and it feels terrible, and then afterwards you don't remember anything because you either pass out or die."
"Wow, that'll definitely motivate me to drink. We're sixteen, god damn it. Hero hasn't even drank yet!"
"That's 'cause he's a mama's boy."
I start to feel a little lightheaded.
"Um..."
"Look, one sip and I'll give you your photos."
"...god, I shoulda just asked Kel. Fine."
It's just flavored water, Sunny.

I take a sip.
"Is that it?"
"You said A sip."
"Yeah, you see, when I say one sip, I mean chug the entire thing."
"...god damn it, fine."

I hate myself for doing this.

fYvE MinNiTs lEitA...

"Ssoo...uhh...Sunnnny...wanna make out?"
"I just realized that the alcohol did nothing. I don't think beer does enough or I'm just really hard in both ways." (AYYYYY MY MANNNNN)
"I'll takeee thhatt asss a yess"
"No. No thank you. I-" Aubrey kisses me as I'm caught off guard. (EWWWW SUNBURN EUGH AGH *cough* IM DYING AAAAA) I immediately pull away.
"WHAT THE FUCK, DUDE? I HAVE A BOYFRIEND, YOU WHORE!"
The door opens.
"S-Sunny?" Basil looks at me in shock.
"Basil, it's not what you-"
Basil runs away.

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1012 words (the copypasta was 415 alone)

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OUR BOYS ARE NOT TOGETHER NO MORE

and i have a chance to make it a noice ending or kill everybody except hero and kel where hero will become the next sunny and kel
uh
kel's just kel idk what he does