Awake

Chapter Thirty-Nine - The Final Exam

"Really?" Kaede didn't sound particularly interested. "That doesn't sound like the you I know. The Nigel I remember loved the thrill of battle, and was dedicated to protecting those under his command."

Nigs looked the other way. "Yeah. Well. He was someone else."

"Take what you can get," Kaede answered. "If you were a warrior in a past life, better that then dying now."

Nigs closed his eyes. "Do you think people will die?"

"I know people will die."

"That's what I was afraid of," he shivered. "Do you think I will die? I've tried it once and it's not something I care to repeat."

"You might," Kaede allowed. "There's no way to calculate who will survive this."

"Are we doing a stupid thing?"

"Probably."

Nigs sighed and half-smiled. "You don't really do reassuring, do you?"

"Find someone else if you want to be cuddled and tucked into bed," Kaede said, but not with any malice. "We could die today. Wouldn't that be fun?"

Nigs shuddered. "Hey, Kaede? What do you think happens to the real you, if you die in a dream?"

Kaede gave him a strange look. "I thought everybody knew that. You just die."

Nigs swallowed hard. He watched her shrug on her jacket and tighten her weapons belt around her narrow waist. She didn't look as though she'd ever doubted anything in her life. He imagined that bullets would bounce off the sheer force of her conviction.

"Kaede?" he asked. "Are you afraid of anything at all?"

Kaede smiled grimly. "Not in this world."

Carmen combed her fingers gently through Ashley's hair, untangling it as she went. Ashley sighed slightly as Carmen twisted the strands back, winding the girl's hair into a braid the way she had been taught. With a feeling of great triumph, she pushed the last pin into place.

"There," she patted Ashley on the shoulder. "It's done."

"Thanks," Ashley stood up with an embarrassed smile. "I'll do yours now."

Carmen sat down and Ashley began to brush out Carmen's hair, so gently that it was almost reverent. Carmen closed her eyes. She thought this a strange custom of Ashley's, braiding other people's hair for them, but it was oddly comforting now. It made her calmer, not on edge.

Carmen had fought battles before. She had killed people before. But this was unfamiliar terrain to her. There was no swaying deck, no cannons, no waves, no ropes to climb up or swing from, no musicians playing a rousing song. She was out of her depth, learning the rules to a whole new game.

  Still, she'd have to be dead before she could no longer fight, and even then her corpse could probably cause some trouble.

"You'll be careful out there, won't you?" Ashley said, in almost motherly tones. "You won't go rushing into danger."

Carmen laughed shortly. "Rushing into danger? Why would I do that? Caution is my middle name."

"I'm serious, Carrie," Ashley said.

"Carrie?" Carmen echoed, never having heard the nickname before.

Ashley's fingers faltered slightly in her hair as she hesitated.

"It's...it's short for Carissa," she apologised. "I'm sorry, I...I forgot for a moment. You know. About the sleeping and things."

"It's alright," Carmen said, and surprisingly it was. "I don't mind."