No Control || Ziam

#three

"Oh, spaces between us keeps getting deeper."

~*~

"Oh, the spaces between us keeps getting deeper." Zayn sang softly as he cleaned up his and Harry's room.

He couldn't help but think of Liam while singing this song. He missed his stubbled jaw that he sometimes scratches. The four arrows tattoo he always traces at night when he can't fall asleep, his strong arms that always made him feel safe.

"It's harder to reach ya.." Zayn found himself sniffling, and kept thinking about Liam. "Even though I try."

He remembered how Liam smelt, the strong smell of his cologne and the smell of his shaving cream.

He thought of how Liam's lips felt like on his own, how it was so soft yet rough, how their lips perfectly moulded in synced.

Zayn felt hot tears slowly run down his cheeks, he quickly wiped them. He sniffed, trying to think of something else rather than him.

"Spaces between us hold all our secrets, leaving us speechless and I don't know why."

He thought of the time Liam and him told each other embarrassing stories, causing him to smile at the memory.

It was 1am on a Sunday morning, Liam and Zayn sat crossed legged on Liam's king sized bed, eating chocolates and junk food as they told each other funny stories and ending up telling each other embarrassing things they have ever done at the end.

"Long story short. Once in Chemistry I got a boner and I had to come up and present in front of the class. It was so embarrassing, I tried to hide it with the poster I had made for the presentation. I tried thinking of sucking my old chemistry teacher's toe to get rid of the boner, but it didn't work. So as I was walking up to the front, I held the poster in front of my crotch basically almost screwing it up. I stood there for five minutes, everyone staring at me and my teacher shouting my name to make me come to life because I just stared at everyone not saying anything. My teacher told me to hold up the poster and show it to the class but I just shook my head and told him that I can't, he asked me why and I just shook my head and blushed. I still had the boner. So my teacher came and grabbed the poster off of me and held it up for the class, I was wearing these really tight skinny jeans that literally showed the outline of the boner. So he held it for the class to see but turned out that everyone wasn't paying attention to the poster I had made, they were paying attention to my boner, causing everyone to whisper out loud and tease me. My teacher saw the boner and told everyone to quieten down, giving me a sorry look. It was the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to me, I swear."

Liam laughed, clutching on his stomach as he tilted his head back and laughed.

"That must've of been embarrassing, babe. May I ask why you had a boner in the first place?"

Zayn took a bite of his snickers, shrugging his shoulders as he chewed. "I don't know, might of thought of something and bam! Boner alert!"

Liam chuckled and popped an m&m into his mouth, looking at Zayn. "Oh the struggles of being a teenage lad."

Zayn chuckled and sighed. "Why can't our mind signal us when we get a boner, that'll be much easier."

Liam smiled and kissed Zayn's shoulder, nodding in agreement. "Couldn't agree more, you give me boners at work, just by looking and thinking about you."

Zayn scrunched up his face and pushed Liam slightly in a joking matter. "Gross."

Zayn shook his head and continued tiding up their bed, rubbing his eyes when he finished fixing up the pillows.

"Spaces between us hold all our secrets." He repeated softly.

They were a secret until everyone found out about them. He smiled at the stolen kisses they shared, the I love you's that no one could hear but them, no one knew about them. They were a secret.

"Who's gonna be the first to say goodbye." Zayn whispered and threw himself down on the made bed.

"I did." He said softly to himself, he shouldn't of have broken up things between them. But he had to do it before Liam did, he knew it wasn't going to work.

He sighed and rubbed his face with both of his hands, slowly sitting up and fixed his long messy hair.

He ran his fingers through his hair and walked towards the balcony, looking ahead.

He inhaled the fresh air and closed his eyes for a moment, God just by thinking about Liam made everything so damn hard.

He shouldn't be thinking about him for god sakes, but yet here he was thinking of the times they were together. The times they shared laughs, kisses. The time Liam held Zayn closely to him and the time they made love, he couldn't help but think back to those moments.

He silently cuss to himself because Liam always seem to pop up into his mind when it wasn't necessary.

He fluttered his eyes open and licked his lips, what has gotten into him.

He wasn't like this before he saw Liam couple of days ago. He wasn't thinking of him a lot, dreaming about him since then.

And also craving to be in his strong arms, pleading to be right next to Liam.

~*~

"Right next to you, Liam." As soon as I turn 18 I'm going to tattoo 'right next to you' on my wrist or somewhere, I'm not even joking. Dedication to my otp.

Comment #rightnexttoyou if you're ziam af