It's the things we love most, that destroy us

Chapter 15

The searing noise along with gasps from onlookers echoes across the training centre like how mockingjays mimic their copied melodies. The crowd formed around us is deathly silent, all their eyes are upon me. I'm so flabbergasted, I can barely move in shock ; the only thing I can feel is the burning sensation of the slap and the ravenous thumping of my heart against my chest. With my jaw dropping from my mouth, I blankly stare at Jeremiah as if I was caught in a trance ; his once wicked smile has now morphed into a satisfactory grin while his gang of careers flap around him like a fly on shit. Are they that clueless, that they don't know the second that gong rings and they eventually become useless to him that he'll just kill them. I mentally laugh at the stupidity, the careers might be living lethal weapons but when it comes to having common sense, they're useless.

Immediately, Nathan comes to my aid, asking me questions that don't register in my jumbled brain. I'm so tongue tied I can't even form a simple sentence. I think I've finally broke."Looks like Odair has an admirer" Jeremiah sneers while I look back to Lake, whose as shocked as I am "Tell me Mellark" Jeremiah beckons me to look at him "Are you going to announce on live television your love for Odair like daddy did to mummy" his curly hair bobbles up and down as he twists his head to the side in a patronising manner. Anger, as hot as the crimson flames which engulfed my cape, begins to creep through my body that I think I've finally found my voice again "Tell me Jeremiah" I say in the same taunting voice he spoke in "Are you going to tell your gang of careers here, that the second they become useless to you in the arena that you'll just kill them". His eyes widen and it becomes extremely evident that he's the type that doesn't like to be shown up, especially by a girl "Your gonna pay for that believe me Mellark, you and your precious boyfriend" Jeremiah spits just as peacekeepers push their ways through the crowd to take him away. "YOU WATCH, YOU'LL BE THE FIRST ONES I KILL WHEN THE GAMES BEGIN !" he shouts as they drag him down the hallway leading into the lunch hall. I aimlessly watch as Jeremiah's body is engulfed in shadow, his haunting words still echo in my ears, as clear as a summers day, each time it repeats it sends another shiver up my spine. What have I done ?

"Are you okay ?" Lake whispers into my ear with one hand protectively on my back, breaking the endless cycle of Jeremiah's last words. "I wish you'd stick up for me like I did for you" I shoot with literal flames in my eyes, I look over to Nathan who I can tell is trying to force himself not to punch Lake in the face. I don't blame him. "What were you guys arguing about anyway ?" I ask with annoyance laced in my voice "Jeremiah thought I took his sword, but when I denied it that's when it started getting tense" Lake replies nonchalantly while swiping his golden hair to the side.

"I'm done !" I say to Nathan ripping Lake's hand away from my back "I'm going back to the apartment, I've had enough drama for today, you coming ?" Nathan briskly nods as we go to walk towards the elevator, not before missing his chance to shoot Lake a penetrating glare. I manage pretty well holding in my emotions but when the elevators metal doors close and we begin to go up, I become a sobbing and blubbering mess. "What did I just do ?" I scream, my hands covering over my weeping eyes "What did, you just do ?" Nathan asks me, I look over to him "I thought he would stick up for me or at least something, not just stand there and cower down !". I kick one of the glass walls in anger and frustration of myself, I feel betrayed, hurt, meek - all these emotions are swirling around my mind like a massive tornado ready to destroy anything that got in its way. In the end I just feel numb. "Shows you where you guys stand then" Nathan poisonously states "..I guess so" I admit wiping away the last of my angry tears.

When the metallic doors finally swing open with the ring of the bell, I dash out of them, through the apartment and into the living room ; ignoring the many questions and confused looks from Haymitch and Effie about our early arrival back. However my feet stop in their tracks, when my gaze lays sight on the one thing I never thought I would see again, the one thing that could fix my broken state ; my precious guitar propped up on the sofa. It feels like heaven in my hands when I tentatively caress the smooth chestnut wood, rub my finger over the quilted strap of woolly greens ; it feels like home. "What is it ?" Nathan questions to my back, breathless from chasing me across the apartment, "My guitar" I whisper, still in denial, sitting on the sofa with my heart feeling as if it's dropped into my stomach. Nathan sits beside me, curiosity playing in his stare "Haymitch told me" he hesitates "That when you sing, all the mockingjays fall silent. Is it true ?" Instead of answering him I begin to strum my fingers across the strings to an ancient lullaby I come to know :