Grave Lies

A kind Gesture

 Rigel destabilized me.
  For two days, I couldn't shake off that feeling.The feeling of him mixed in my blood.There were times when I was sure I knew everything about him.Other times, however, there were so many shadowy areas that dotted him, thatI convinced myself otherwise.Rigel was like an elegant beast dressed in his most beautiful cloak, butinside he hid a wild and unpredictable nature, at timesoverwhelming, which made him inaccessible to everyone.On the other hand, he had always done everything possible to prevent mefrom understanding him: every time I got too close, he "bit" me with hiswords and growled at me to stay away, as he had done that night in thekitchen. But then there were certain situations, illogical and contradictory, andI couldn't explain his behavior.He confused me, unsettled me, he was insidious, and I would have done well tofollow his warning: stay away from him.Excluding my relationship with Rigel, I couldn't say that things were not go well. I adored my new family.Norman was delightfully clumsy, and Anna looked more and more likethe dream I had fantasized about as a child. She was nurturing,intelligent, attentive, and always made sure I ate and feltgood. I already knew I was very thin, that I didn't have the healthy rosy colorof other girls my age, but I wasn't used to receivingthat kind of attention.She was a true mother figure, and although I didn't have the courage to tell her, I wasgrowing fond of her as if she were already "mine."The girl who years ago dreamed of reaching the sky and finding someone whowould set her free, now looked at that reality through enchanted eyes.Would I be able to not end up losing everything?I left my room after another afternoon of homework. I studied a lot and triedto be good; above all, I wanted Anna and Norman to behappy with me.To my surprise, I ran into someone in the dining room.It was Klaus, the house cat. He had definitely decided to show himself.I felt a warm pleasure to encounter him outside my room, becauseI love animals and it makes me very happy to interact with them."Hello," I whispered with a smile.He looked very beautiful. His soft, long cotton candy-like fur,a lovely gunmetal gray color, framed two splendid round yellow eyes.Anna had told me he was ten years old, but he carried himselfwith great pride and dignity."You're so handsome," I flattered him, wondering if he would let mepet him. He looked at me with his suspicious eyes. And finally, he raised his tail andwalked away.I followed him like a child, watching him with passionate eyes, but He gave me a wary look, indicating that he wasn't in the mood. He jumped out the window and landed on the roof, leaving me alone in the hallway. He must be a lonely type... I was about to leave when a sound caught my attention. I didn't realize it at first: it sounded like a panting and it was coming from the next room. But it wasn't just any room. It was Rigel's room. I deduced that it was his breathing. I knew I shouldn't enter, that I had to stay away, but hearing him breathe like that made me forget my intentions for a moment. The door was slightly ajar and I looked inside. I saw his imposing figure. He was standing in the center of the room, with his back turned to me. Through the crack, I could catch a glimpse of the swollen veins in his arms; he held them rigid, with his fists on his hips. It was his fists that caught my attention. The skin on his knuckles was taut, and he clenched his bloodless fingers tightly. I noticed that he tensed his muscles all the way up to his shoulder, and I didn't understand why. He seemed... angry? The floor betrayed me with a creak before I could get a better look. His eyes pierced through me and I startled. I instinctively stepped back and immediately the door slammed shut, shattering all my conjectures. I couldn't stop thinking about it as I looked at the room. Had he realized it was me? Or did he simply think there was someone there? A mortifying pang stabbed my chest, and doubts tormented my soul. I bit my lip and walked back until I saw a clear path. "Nica," I heard Anna's voice calling me, "could you help me?" She was carrying a basket of freshly laundered clothes. I pushed aside my unease and instantly went to where she was, trembling, as I always did when she addressed me. "Of course." "Thank you. I still have things to do, so if you could start putting away this laundry... Do you know where it goes?" I took the fragrant basket and assured her that I would be able to find the exact drawer where she kept her lace doilies. The house wasn't that big, I had already explored it from top to bottom, so I would stop occasionally to fill a drawer or open a door; I learned where some things were, and on that occasion, I got to know it even more deeply. While putting away my dresses in my room, I felt embarrassed that Anna had seen how old and worn out they were. When I left my room, I noticed that there were two short-sleeved shirts left in the basket. They were men's shirts. I touched them with my fingers, undecided. I wondered, although I already knew the answer for sure, if Norman would wear such worn-out clothes. They belonged to Rigel. I turned towards the door of his room. After what had happened just a few minutes ago, the idea of going back in there paralyzed me. I wasn't sure if he had recognized me, but I knew that he had strictly forbidden me from entering his room. Rigel had been very clear about it. But I was doing Anna a favor. With everything she had done for me, how could I deny her such an insignificant gesture? I assured her that she could trust me with a task as simple as that, and I didn't want to go back to her and eat my words. I couldn't make up my mind, but I found myself in front of that door once again. I swallowed, raised my hand, gathered my courage, and timidly touched it. There was no response. Had I knocked too softly? The idea that maybe there was no one in the room sparked a little lightbulb inside me and infused me with courage. Rigel had told me not to enter, and it would be better if I listened to him, but I could take advantage of his absence to leave his clothes there without having to see him. I gripped the handle, lowered it... And jumped as soon as I saw the metal slip through my fingers. The door opened, and all my hopes vanished. His irises captured me as if by a dark enchantment. As soon as I had him in front of me, my legs started to tremble. How was it possible for a seventeen-year-old boy to burn with his eyes in that way? "What were you trying to do?" he asked, dragging the words with a cold voice. His expression did not promise anything good. I immediately lowered my gaze to the laundry, and he did the same. "I...," I stammered, "These are yours, I just wanted to leave them..." "What part," Rigel inquired, "of the phrase 'do not enter my room' wasn't clear to you?" I swallowed hard, and for a moment, I thought that the cold hardness radiating from his eyes would crush me. "Anna asked me," I explained. It was essential that I made it clear to him that I hadn't come there out of any personal interest, but out of my sense of duty. I realized too late that those words seemed like a lie. "She asked me to lend a hand. I'm doing her a favor..." "Do yourself a favor," Rigel interrupted me. He snatched the basket from my hands with a sharp gesture. His piercing and admonishing pupils left me paralyzed. "Disappear, Nica."