Everything I Didn't Say

Fourteen

Rosalie

On the way to Leah's parents house, my hands began to sweat and my stomach began to churn so violently that I was afraid I would throw up my lunch. Leah assured me that her mother accepted the news positively and was looking forward to meeting both us both. I took a deep breath and wiped my hands on my dress as we drew into the driveway of his mother's spacious bungalow. Leah grasped my hand and kissed it tenderly.

"Baby, don't worry; my mum has never been this happy before; it'll be fine I promise"

I grin at her uncomfortably and try not to panic as she leaves the car and opens the back door to get Millie from her car seat. I let myself out and circle round to join them as we make our way to the front door. Leah puts her hand on my shoulder and whispers, "You'll be fine, i promise," before planting a kiss on my cheek and leading me to the front door. Millie is in a merry and giddy mood after waking up from her nap earlier. Leah rings the bell, and when the door swings wide, I see a friendly woman who is obviously happy to see us

"Hello! Come on in my loves" we are welcomed inside as she moves aside. Leah takes the lead, and I trudge along behind her, so nervous that I can hardly feel my feet on the ground. She pulls me into a warm, motherly hug and says, "Its so nice to see you again Rosa" two of us pause in the foyer.

"And who is this little button?" Amanda asks. Millie, who I can see is now aware that she is now the centre of attention, continues to smile and giggle while she is being held by Leah.

"Mum, This is Millie. Millie, this is your Grandmama" As I listen to Leah introducing them, I see Amanda start to cry as she stands in front of Leah and Millie.

"Gamma!" Millie squeals with delight as she grins towards Amanda and claps her hands in Amanda's direction.

"You can call me whatever you like my little darling," Amanda says as she gently strokes Millie's hand with her thumb.

At that same time, Leah and I lock gazes and exchange reassuring smiles. My heart is so full.

David and Jacob are waiting for us in the back garden. As we follow Amanda out the patio doors towards them, Leah, still carrying Millie, rests her other hand softly at the bottom of my back. Both of them get up and start to stroll over to us. Jacob is standing closest to me. "Its so nice to see you again" he says to me with a kind smile, pulling me into a brief embrace. "Hello, Jacob" I smile timidly and reply, "It's great to be back"

David approaches and exclaims, "Rosa!" Its so great you're back!" He enthusiastically greets me with, "So lovely to see you again" before embracing me and pecking me on the cheek.

"Its so nice to be back Dave" I reply as everyone's eyes are drawn to Millie , who is still held by Leah.

Leah introduces them, beaming like the proud mother that she is, "So Uncle Jacob and Grandpa, this is Millie" They approach Millie , and Jacob says, "Hello, young lady, I'm your Uncle Jacob" stroking her face with a finger and beaming.

"And I'm your Grandpa" David adds with a wry grin.

Laughing, we move towards the table and chairs sat in the shade. Millie is energetic after waking up from her nap, so we let her run around on the grass and play until Jacob worked up enough courage to join her. We end up talking for hours about my time in London with Thea and how we've settled there. After some time, Leah and David join Jacob and Millie playing on the grass, and at that point, Amanda and I are the only ones left sitting here.

Very quickly after we arrived, I began to feel more at ease. It's not hard for me at all to have a conversation with Leah's mother. The fact that she will be a part of Millie's life brings comfort since she reminds me of my own mother, but it also makes me sad and causes me to miss her.

When she inquires about my pregnancy and delivery, I tell her that I was alone except for Louisa and Jo, and I feel the disappointment in her eyes. I debated telling her the whole story about how we spent the first weeks of Millie's life in the hospital and how Louisa had to move in with us when we went home so she could help out. However, I reminded myself that I hadn't committed any wrongdoing and therefore had no motive to lie.

Seeing the disappointment on her face at Leah's absence made me realise that she was genuinely sympathetic. That was in the past, though, and all I could think about was how glad I was that he'd finally arrived and that Millie now had the loving family I'd wished for her.

As Amanda and I watch the Leah and her brother and father chase a giggling, screeching Millie around the garden, she says, "Sweetheart, I am so sorry you had to do this on your own for so long." Her eyes are warm and empathetic. "You should be extremely proud of yourself; you've done a wonderful job with that little girl."

She puts her hand on top of mine and gently rubs it, saying, "I don't agree with what Leah done to you, but I can tell that she truly loves both of you, I really hope you both get the chance at happiness because i would love to see more of both you and Millie "She starts off by saying, "Leah told me that your mother passed away a few years ago" before adding, " if you ever need a motherly chat, or even grandmama help with Millie, please don't think twice about coming to me Darling. Whatever happens between you and Leah doesn't change the fact that I'll always be there for you and Millie" She tells me, tears streaming down her cheeks, "You have brought happiness in the form of that little girl into this house again after a dark few years."

As the tears start to well up in my eyes, Amanda wraps her motherly arms around me. "You have no idea how much I appreciate it, Amanda" I feel myself becoming more upset as I add "It has been so difficult having Millie without my mum here". A long breath aids, and I dry my eyes. "I don't want to ruin such a lovely afternoon, no more crying!" I exclaim, trying to cheer myself up. We continue to sit and watch them play with Millie , unsure of whether or not Sure who was having more fun. Amanda invites us to stay for dinner, and we happily accept. Millie thoroughly enjoyed being the centre of attention as we spent several more hours with Leah's family.

She spent the afternoon playing in the garden with her mum, uncle and grandpa, and then spent the rest of our visit with Amanda, eventually climbing up onto her lap and falling asleep.

Just by glancing at Amanda, I could tell that she absolutely adored Millie. Millie's bedtime had already passed, but I didn't want to ruin their special moment together, so I let it slip. I looked away from Amanda to Millie, and noticed Leah's watery eyes as she observed her mother and daughter. As I wander and stand by her side, my hand rests on her back and my chin rests on her arm. Softly, I inquire, "You okay, Williamson?"

"Rosie, you don't know how happy you've made me" she says, "I know I don't deserve you, but I promise I will spend the rest of my life showing to you how much I love you both."

What the hell did she say? Did i hear her right? Wait, did she just tell me she loves me?

Confused and sure that I must have misunderstood her, I ask, "What did you just say?"She is glaring down at me. As she looks at me, I can see the sparkle in her eyes.

"Rosie, I have loved you since the day we met. Even though we were apart, my love for you never changed. When I look over and watch you and Millie together, my love for you deepens day by day" she continues in a bit of a rambling, and I can tell she's nervous, "I love you Rosie, okay? I couldn't ask for a better mother for my child, and watching how you care for her makes me fall in love with you more and more. More than words can express, I love you."

I raise my arms to encircle her neck and give her a passionate kiss. She puts her hands on my waist, lifting me and spins me around like a princess in a Disney movie. She puts me down as we suddenly remember where we are, and as we turn to look, Amanda is there in the doorway, smiling broadly as she holds Millie in her arms.

Happiness, pure happiness is all i feel right now.